Hey all! Georgie Morvis here to liveblog the Grammys. They’re live on CBS at 7:00 our time. Lady Gaga has arrived in an egg. Obviously, it’s going to be epic. Until then I’m watching red carpet coverage on E! and it’s just as painfully awkward as usual.
6:21pm Poor Sara Bareilles, having to sit through Giuliana and Seacrest’s awkward banter about absolutely nothing.
6:24pm Willow Smith actually dressed like a normal person for tonight’s event. Get it girl. Whip that hair. Also apparently she’s performing with Justin Bieber. What a beautiful, beautiful alignment of talent.
6:26pm I may hate Miley Cyrus but props to her for taking over her interview with Seacrest. What have you been doing, Ryan?
6:29pm Janelle Monae is beautiful!
6:30pm NICOLE KIDMAN.
6:35pm Justin Bieber getting interviewed.
6:51pm Temporarily switched the channel to watch Gaga on 60 Minutes. Now I’m back. Heidi Klum and Seal! Klum looks great.
6:59pm Hope Gaga is the opener again. Here we go!
7:00pm Apparently the Aretha Franklin tribute is first. I’m excited! Florence and the Machine AND Jennifer Hudson. I’m there.
7:02pm How has LL Cool J won two Grammys?!
7:04pm Jennifer is gorgeous and has the most gorgeous voice. Martina McBride sounds great too. Aguleira is probs gonna mess up the lyrics here…
Alieza Schvimer is here with me now to liveblog.
7:04pm AS: She actually didn’t screw up the lyrics!
7:05pm AS: Is she even singing words? She can’t screw up the lyrics if she doesn’t sing words.
7:06pm GM: As good as she is at singing, I do not like watching Aguleira perform at all. Really like Martina’s voice though.
7:08pm GM: Florence is working the hand-flap. And she sounds incredible. AND NOW JHUD IS DOING RESPECT.
7:10pm GM: The only disappointing part of this medley is the severe lack of Aretha Franklin hats.
7:11pm AS: The shoulder pad seems to be making a comeback.
7:21pm GM: First Grammy of the night goes to Hey Soul Sister (Live) by Train for Best Pop Duo or Group. VOM. I hate this song and its stupid lyrics that don’t make sense.
7:22pm J. Biebz reference count: 1.
7:22pm BORN THIS WAY OMG
7:30pm GM: Lady Gaga sang live, she danced amazingly, the outfit wasn’t overly bizarre, probably her best actual performance to date. It was a very Grammys-esque performance. It’ll be hard to choose between that and the Aretha Franklin tribute for performance of the night.
7:33pm GM: Miranda Lambert gets to follow up Lady Gaga, but this song is amazing.
7:38pm For those who are interested, Miranda Lambert is playing at SLU on Thursday, February 24.
7:39pm GM: And now Muse, playing a song that isn’t Starlight, therefore I don’t care.
7:41pm GM: This song would mash up really well with Blondie’s “Call Me.”
7:49pm AS: YES to Ryan Seacrest. GM: …
7:50pm Gm: B.o.B, Bruno Mars, and Janelle Monae performing! AS: Who is Janelle Monae?
7:52pm AS: I don’t really understand the purpose of this being in black and white. Oh, because grenades are just such inferior technology.
7:55pm GM: Janelle Monae better hit it big after this. I LOVE HER.
7:58pm GM: Zac Brown Band presenting Female Country Vocal. It goes to… Miranda Lambert for The House That Built Me. Once again, she’s performing at SLU on the 24th!
8:05pm GM: It’s Bieber time! AS: This might save the Grammys for me.
8:06pm GM: This is kinda homoerotic. Usher and Bieber should never try acting.
8:08pm AS: Are they going to zoom in on Selena Gomez soon?
8:10pm GM: Dangit, Willow is in the audience with her parents. Jaden killed his rap.
8:13pm GM: They just got a standing O from Will Smith and Nicole Kidman. THEY HAVE OSCAR NOMINATIONS.
813pm GM: Paramore and that Zooey Deschanel wannabe from NCIS presenting Best Rock Album to Muse for The Resistance.
8:21pm GM: Selena Gomez and someone who isn’t Justin Bieber present Best Pop Vocal Album to The Fame Monster for Lady Gaga and her butt.
8:25pm GM: David Letterman introduces another old person (Bob Dylan) and Mumford and Sons.
8:28pm GM: Wait, Avett Brothers are here too, singing something that sounds like the Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.
8:31pm GM: Bob Dylan… someone needs to escort him off the stage. His mic is broken or something. And he looks lost.
8:40pm GM: Lady Antebellum introduced by Lea Michele and Clay Matthews, aka two really random people that probably don’t belong at the Grammys.
8:42pm GM: Lady Antebellum is performing Need You Now… It’s a quarter until nine, I’m a little bored, and I need the Grammys to hurry up…
8:44pm GM: Miley Cyrus and Kings of Leon (IT’S CAUSE THEY’RE FROM TENNESSEE) present Best Country Album to Lady Antebellum for I’m a Desperate Booty Call… I mean Need You Now. Shoulda been Miranda Lambert.
8:46pm GM: Jamie Foxx makes a bunch of dumb jokes about Forget You and then introduces Cee-Lo Green, The Muppets, and Gwyneth Paltrow performing Forget You. I don’t understand the hype over this song AT ALL.
8:48pm GM: Cee-Lo just forgot a line to his own song ahahaha
8:50pm GM: Where are the Muppets that matter…
8:57pm GM: Neil Patrick Harris introduces Katy Perry, who performs a song that I’ve never heard. AS: The reason I’m watching the Grammys! GM: Sounds like a Taylor Swift song…
9:00pm GM: This is going to be awkward when Katy and Russell Brand get divorced…
9:01pm GM: Nicole Kidman was singing along to Teenage Dream just now. WHAT.
9:03pm GM: Norah Jones, Keith Urban, and John Mayer perform a tribute to Dolly Parton, who is not dead.
9:05pm GM: Those same three present song of the year to Lady Antebellum for Need You Now.
9:12pm GM: Seth Rogen just made a Miley Cyrus joke. Introduces Eminem, Dre, Rihanna, the guy from Maroon 5 and someone named Skyler.
9:14pm GM: Some shitty background flames behind Love the Way You Live Part II… dying of laughter.
9:15pm GM: Yeah, a standing ovation for the most misogynistic man in hip hop. Way to go.
9:18pm GM: The girl that might be named Skyler keeps on wailing about how she needs a Dr. CAN DR. DRE COME OUT ALREADY SO SHE CAN SHUT UP?!
9:20PM GM: John Legend and Jewel present Best New Artist to Esperanza Spalding… who isn’t Florence and the Machine or Justin Bieber, so I don’t understand what is going on. AS: SHOULDA BEEN BIEBER.
9:25pm GM: Esperanza Spalding is the only New Artist not scheduled to perform tonight… So awkward.
9:28 AS: Matthew Morrison and I have the same birthday, nbd. He also introduces the Grammy President and it’s really predictably boring.
9:30pm GM: Oh, apparently they crammed Esperanza in to the jazz band that plays behind the Grammy President… poor girl.
9:35pm GM: And Mick Jagger is paying tribute to Solomon Burke. Apparently this is the first time he’s been on the Grammy stage. That’s just embarrassing, Grammy planning committee.
9:46pm AS: Barbara Streisand is here to promote Little Fockers, obvi.
9:51pm GM: Nicki Minaj and will.i.am present Best Rap Album to Eminem for Misogyny and Homophobia. Nicki Minaj is wearing her wig from the Bride of Blackenstein SNL skit.
9:58pm GM: The announcer just called Diddy Puff Daddy. Is this 2004?! He introduces What’s My Name… AHAHAHA BEST PUN EVER
10:04pm GM: A very awkward J. Lo and her husband present Record of the Year to Need You Now by Lady Antebellum.
10:11pm GM: Jason Segel cracks some jokes and introduces Arcade Fire.
10:22pm GM: After a crazy, seizure-inducing Arcade Fire performance of Month of May, Babs and Kris Kristofferson present Album of the Year to Arcade Fire for The Suburbs. Deal with it, Katy Perry and Eminem and Lady Antebellum. AS: Too upset over Katy and J. Biebz. And Arcade Fire is performing an encore!
That’s it for us!