I’m no history expert, but I think it’s safe to say that for as long as people have been having sex, they were also making jokes about it. I mean, it’s… sex. Everyone has a funny tale to tell, something they make you promise you won’t tell anyone else but is maybe so funny that the laughs just keep coming (pun intended). 

There are the classics like the “that’s what she said…,” kind of jokes, and then there is what the three improv groups on campus — SPISH, Mama’s Pot Roast (MPR), and K.A.R.L. — cooked up this year, on the spot, for your pleasure. 

After playing a couple games with each group, here is what they came (sorry, I didn’t mean to finish) up with. 

The first game they played was “sex with me is like…,” and each improvisor had to fill in the punchline with an assigned word. The first word was “airport.”

Manuel Lopez | Staff Illustrator

K.A.R.L. 

“Sex with me is like an airport: I didn’t know how annoying it was to do with my family until I finally did it with my friends.”

“Sex with me is like an airport: You feel dirty afterwards, but you are too tired to shower.”

The second word was “pilots.”

SPISH

“Sex with me is like pilots: the best part is when you don’t use your hands.”

K.A.R.L.

“Sex with me is like pilots: If I drink before, we’re going down.” 

The last word for this game was “sweaters.” 

K.A.R.L.

“Sex with me is like sweaters: I put my body in it.”

The next game was “my sex life is like…,” and the first word was “classes.”

MPR

“My sex life is like classes: Everyone wants me in their group project.”

“My sex life is like classes: I might step outside to call my mom.”

“My sex life is like classes: No, I didn’t need to use the bathroom, you were just boring.” 

“My sex life is like classes: Please put your hand all the way up.”

The next word for this game was “cars.” 

SPISH 

“My sex life is like cars: I prefer Italians.”

“My sex life is like cars: I like it when everything is fitted in leather.”

MPR

The last word for this game was “snow.”

Manuel Lopez | Staff Illustrator

SPISH 

“My sex life is like snow: There’s lots of slippery mounds and curves involved.”

“My sex life is like snow: It impacts my seasonal affective disorder.”

“My sex life is like snow: At first it was fun and new and shiny, but now it’s gray and weird and gritty.” 

MPR

“My sex life is like snow: Because of it, I have a bruised ass.”

“My sex life is like snow: they say eight inches…”

We could only end this column with a K.A.R.L. Classic — the game “I like my.” We started with the word “TSA.” 

Manuel Lopez | Staff Illustrator

K.A.R.L.

“I like my men how I like the TSA: He wants my cream so bad, so bad, all he is doing is asking how he can get my cream.”

“I like my men how I like the TSA: Oooo, I pre-checked.”

“I like my men how I like the TSA: obsessed with 9/11.”

The last word was “WashU students.”

“I like my women how I like my WashU students: in the top 1% but pretending like they’re not.” 

“I like my men how I like my WashU students: with a stick up their ass.”

“I like my men how I like my WashU frat guys: throwing my eggs all over the place.” 

Hope one or some of these jokes made you chortle, chuckle, or cringe. Check out any one of these groups’ upcoming shows this semester!