Anna Dorsey | Staff Illustrator

I’m writing this column the day before I drive roughly 10 hours from St. Louis to Hammond, Louisiana, to visit someone I’ve been “seeing” — not really dating but more than just fooling around — since the summer. Ever since I booked the car, I’ve doubted whether or not I can stand behind this decision. This person and I aren’t exclusive. We aren’t official. I have no clue whether or not this situation will last past this month or the next. But I like this person. I wouldn’t say that I’ve fallen head over heels, but I love their company. And I’m willing to drive those 10 or so hours to have them in my company again. 

I understand that I’m making an underdeveloped-frontal-lobe-having decision, but I only have so much time left to drive 10 hours across the country just to see my boo thang until my days are consumed by the dreaded obligations of adulthood. Thus, in my admittedly romantic view of time, it’s important for us to join the chain of fools and be suckers for love while we still have time to make the memories that come with being in love or simply just enjoying how someone makes you feel. 

This isn’t to say to completely lose all sense of self. As with all issues of the heart, it’s important to stay smart and protect yourself, whether that means setting firm communication boundaries or leaving your situation nonexclusive until the time is “right.” But we must also find the balance between guarding ourselves and embracing intimacy in order for us to enjoy the affection we deserve.