The most notable thing about the fall 2007 TV season is how few of the shows that premiered remain, but then again, that happens every year.

So you dropped the ball on dinner reservations for graduation. Maybe your parents have been hounding you for weeks and you just ignored them (in which case you’re really in trouble) or maybe you didn’t even think about it until all of your friends started talking about the reservations that they made two months ago.

The first version I wrote of this column was unapologetically sarcastic, an exercise in self-mockery that used the phrase “this is SO college” as refrain and lamented the lack of both Nietzsche and Natural Light in my life next year. It was reflective of what I found easiest to say and what, I figured, an audience of equally sarcastic and sentiment-avoiding Wash. U.

The year the Class of 2011 entered Wash. U.—2007—was like most years in the movies: It had unbelievable highs and inconceivable lows. The top-grossing movie was “Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End,” which many thought (and hoped) would be the last film in the series. Alas, another was made, and it’s being released on the same day as Commencement—May 20.

Stay inspired. Two words, four syllables. The best advice I’ve ever gotten about life in the real world. My four years here have left me with a fiery idealism and burning restlessness to approach this canvas we call earth and beautifully paint a piece of it. I hope your education has done the same.

Are you sick of waiting around for graduation with family members invading your personal space? St. Louis may not have Times Square or the Golden Gate Bridge, but it still has plenty of attractions. Scene has selected four locations to entertain them and keep the pressure off of you.

The year started with the University’s largest-ever incoming class and the further transformation of the South 40.

“The Orange Box”: Four years later, each game in the dreadfully named “Orange Box” has graduated to becoming legends in their own right. “Half-Life 2: Episode Two” was the last the world has seen of Gordon Freeman, and he has yet to reappear. “Team Fortress 2” has gone from elegant class-based shooter to war-themed hat simulator.

Another one bites the dust. With the publication of this column, my Washington University bucket list is complete. But there are plenty of others to go. I’ve written for each section of Student Life, travelled the globe, created priceless memories and formed lifelong friendships.

As a Student Life/Cadenza tradition, seniors write farewell articles for the Commencement issue that you are now holding in your hands. Previous submissions have both managed to offend every single person on campus and offered to buy everyone drinks. I am too diffident and poor to accomplish either of those things.