Past: Why weren’t we born a decade earlier?

It would have been awesome to be a member of the Class of 2003…in terms of W.I.L.D., that is. With just one glance at the lineup they had during their four years at Washington University, anyone would be envious. In the spring of 2000, their freshman year, Outkast and Dispatch played. Then, in the fall of 2002 the Black Eyed Peas came, followed by Better Than Ezra in the spring of 2003.

OutKast’s quadruple-platinum fourth album “Stankonia” was released in Oct. 2000, only a few months after the hip-hop duo appeared at W.I.L.D. OutKast is one of the most successful hip-hop groups of all time. To be able to claim that you heard OutKast when they performed at your university would warrant major coolness points in my book. If only I could actually say that; too bad I was still in elementary school.

Better Than Ezra skyrocketed to number one on the charts with their first single “Good” in 1995. In the spring of 2003, the band’s most popular recent single would have been “Extra Ordinary” or “A Lifetime.” Their rock/alternative music was perfect for a spring W.I.L.D. That is not to mention their considerable discography that would have been even more popular to Wash. U. students.

If the Black Eyed Peas’ W.I.L.D. performance was anything like their performances today (think back to the Super Bowl), it must have been epic, to say the least. Why wasn’t I born a decade earlier to witness this performance?

However, it is worth noting that the Black Eyed Peas came to campus before they became the big music sensation they are today. Fergie had just joined the group in 2002, and their first hit single, “Where is the Love?” did not drop until 2003. This begs the question: Does time make the past W.I.L.D. acts seem larger than they really were? Team 31 has picked W.I.L.D. artists on the brink of success before. For example, take B.o.B (“Nothin’ on You,” “Airplanes”) who performed in the spring of 2009, a year before his debut album was released. From Grammys to MTV Video Music Awards to American Music Awards, B.o.B. has himself a true music career—and all of us who were here at Wash. U. for his W.I.L.D. performance got an early look at his talent.

The class of 2003’s W.I.L.D. experiences are something that, unfortunately, I will only be able to experience through stories passed down. Nonetheless, I’ve got my own W.I.L.D. experiences to pass on, and hopefully, in ten years, a Wash. U. student will envy the performers I have had the privilege of seeing.

Present: Are the acts worth coming to?

We have a feeling that all of you reading this probably have an idea of how you’re going to spend your W.I.L.D., but for those who’ve never done it before, here’s a blow-by-blow of the day’s official acts. Cadenza trusts you’ll be able to figure out what to do before the concert actually starts.

4 p.m.: Doors—It’s time to make the extraordinarily difficult walk all the way to the Brookings Quad. For those coming from faraway lands like Shepley or Greenway, be prepared. There’s no water in the quad. But once you make it, you get the fun experience of waiting in line and (possibly) getting patted down. Then it’s on to the glorious grassland.

4:15 p.m.: Battle of the Bands Winner—The Second Stage winner won’t be announced until tomorrow, because, well, the Battle of the Bands won’t happen until tomorrow. If you’ve already made it to the Quad, it’s time to enjoy the sounds of Rhyme N Reason, the Jake Bertons or the Greasy Watermelon. It’s also time to pray that the losing bands are able to accept defeat in peace instead of rebelling during the show.

4:45 p.m.: DJ Khizcuts—Also known as Khiz Munir, Washington University’s own DJ Khizcuts gets to take the stage now. Time to begin the DJ’d/mashup portion of the evening.

5:35 p.m.: OCD: Moosh & Twist!—This Philadelphia hip-hop duo has a weird name. Combining a mental disorder with two rap aliases makes me confused, but somehow it starts to make sense when we consider that the performers just graduated high school a few months ago. Remind me why we don’t just save money for one big act.

6 p.m.: Alcohol Cut-Off—This is the most important part of the night for those lucky, but late-coming, non-minors (majors? over-21ers?) Make sure you lug the six-pack before the dreaded deadline, or else that far, far walk was for nothing.

6:45 p.m.: The White Panda—Okay, the group may not be as cool as Super Mash Bros., but we take what we can get. It’s always a good experience to start singing along to your favorite song for five seconds, only to realize it’s disappeared from your auditory cortex before you actively recognize the song.

7:45 p.m.: 3lau—The second Wash. U. DJ of the night, 3lau, also known as Justin Blau, takes the stage. If you’re a little worn out by the recorded music, feel free to take this opportunity to “lie down.”

8:35 p.m.: Mike Posner—Although “Cooler Than Me” may be slightly less cool than the country’s biggest paint party, we have a leading act that people have actually heard of. If you’re still standing by 8:35 p.m., it’s time to enjoy the smooth sounds of the 2010 Duke graduate.

Top things you’ll wish you had known by W.I.L.D.

Your first W.I.L.D. is a learning experience. It’s like a tailgate, but there’s not much food…or a sporting event to follow. Instead of just learning the lessons yourself, listen to some advice that future-you will certainly want you to have known.

1. From far away, it’s acceptable to think that Mike Posner looks like Justin Timberlake. Less acceptable? Shouting that he looks like a JT bobblehead doll during his performance.

2. SLR cameras will not be allowed in. Don’t bring your super-special camera just to be turned away at the door.

3. Pretending to be the bassist of Battle of the Bands winner will not get you groupies.

4. You’re never going to find your friends once you’re on the quad. Try having a charged cell phone, and you’ll have a chance, but the best thing you can probably do is force all your friends to wear the brightest shirt they own. And if you can’t find them, you can at least provide the rest of us with amusement at seeing a 6’4” guy in neon pink.

5. No matter how short the food line is, it will take a disgustingly long time to get your burrito/pizza slice, especially when the beer-induced, time-distorting goggles are on. Try to get in line before you’re starving.

6. It’s important to drink just the right amount. They warn you about getting so drunk that you end up in the hospital, but has anyone ever told you how lame it is to have a hangover by the time Mike Posner comes on? Being exhausted and dehydrated while standing in a mosh pit is never a good situation.

7. Speaking of being dehydrated, there was no bottled water at W.I.L.D. last year. We all know the University’s vendetta against bottled water, but this was a little ridiculous. Advice for the future? Sneak into the quad tonight and hide some in the bushes. You won’t regret it.

8. And in regards to drinking enough, all the buildings on the Quad will be locked. Your only bathroom option is a port-a-potty, so come having emptied your bladder before you get trapped.

9. The upperclassmen guys aren’t trying to hook up with you because you’re a drunk freshmen—they’re not that discriminatory. It’s just because you’re a drunk girl.

10. Worst mistake you can make during W.I.L.D.? Staying sober during the day because you’re planning to go to frats after. Word to the wise—they’re all closed.