From where does our namesake come? Last time I checked, campus is not very close to Washington, Mo. There does not seem to be any connection with Washington, D.C., our capital, or Washington State. If the name has anything to do with a certain president, Mr. George Washington, then one would think we might have a day off from school in his honor. Maybe make it a four-day weekend right after work starts getting really hard after Christmas break, when everyone could really use a vacation. When was his birthday again? It wouldn’t matter if no one else celebrated the day, we would be special because we are named after the glory and moral fortitude of our exemplary president. Because this is not the case, and no such break for Washington University students exists, I have a hard time seeing any connection with anything Washington.
Furthermore, the name holds our school back from true greatness. One sign of a school’s greatness: its sweet school apparel. As it stands now, we have some of the most awkward looking school sweatshirts, t-shirts, jackets, etc. In no way do I blame the designers of said clothes, they have done the best they can with what they have been given. Where does one put the title “Washington University in St. Louis” on an article of clothing?
Across the chest the phrase is too long and the words either become miniscule to the point of illegibility, or they need to be put on two lines making the name into an ironic statement as is popular among contemporary t-shirt designers (e.g. I have a shirt that says “Sugar Daddy” on the front. The irony: I’m broke). I have seen the name written on the sleeve such that it goes from the top of the shoulder to the start of the wrist, a horrific sight indeed.
I have also looked enviously on one word sweatshirts that ring with the pride and power of some of the other top 15 Universities in our nation: Duke, Penn, Stanford, Brown, Yale. These names fit nicely on a shirt, but more importantly each of them presents a distinct picture of the school’s identity. There are many people that own, and wear, Duke and Yale clothes who do not go to Duke or Yale. I think you would be hard pressed to find someone not related to Washington University in St. Louis wearing one of our cluttered shirts. From a marketing standpoint, Duke and Yale have free advertising on the chests of all those wearing the college gear while Washington University in St. Louis drifts into obscurity.
Another sign of greatness for an American university is its name recognition. An experiment: take – 0 people from across the nation and show them the U.S. News report of the top 20 colleges in the nation and ask them what they know about each college/university. I will bet my life savings (careful now-remember, I’m broke) that Wash. U., for the largest percentage of people, is the least recognized school on the list.
How many times have you, my fellow students, had to explain that Washington University in St. Louis is in St. Louis? I cannot count (mostly because I am an English student) the number of times I have been asked what going to school on the West Coast is like, or how I view the fast paced political life going on all around me. How is it possible that all of your natural talents, inherent brightness and hard work is almost entirely unappreciated by the masses of people that do not know where you go to school, whereas if you went to a more reputable yet academically inferior school, like Brown, you would be celebrated as a genius? This, my friends, is an outrage.
Here is what I propose: Budweiser University. It is no secret that there is a deep and long lasting relationship with Wash. U. and the Anheuser-Busch company. We can thank our friends making Budweiser beer for Anheuser-Busch Hall, Busch Laboratory and Busch Hall, three prominent buildings on our campus. The school’s liberal drinking policy clearly says something about Wash. U.’s existing relationship with the Anheuser-Busch company (after all, who is drinking Natty Light other than underage college students?).
The amount of money the school would make from such a sponsorship would allow the school to continue growing in size and excellence. It might even be enough money to stop charging us for printing in the library. The national recognition would make the school the most popular university in the nation and, if the school kept its same selective standards, might firmly root our school in the top ten in the country.
Our school apparel would be professionally designed and memorable, and our school’s name would have a connection to deep-rooted St. Louis heritage. Most importantly, however, we would finally have a household reputation: “You go to Budweiser University? You must be some kind of freakin’ genius! How do you like St. Louis?”
Christian is a junior in Arts & Sciences. He can be reached via e-mail at [email protected].