nooz informashuns

Woods-Smith Center for Making Moral Decisions to open next spring

Chancellor Mark Wrighton announced Monday that the Woods-Smith Center for Making Moral Decisions will open on campus for the spring 2011 semester.

Bob Blagojevich | News Reporter

Student Life writes yet another article on Nick Yozamp

Student Life’s coverage of Nick Yozamp’s victory of the 2010 Jeopardy! College Championship will take on new territory, as the staff plans to write a series of articles about Yozamp over the next month. The entire staff has religiously followed and detailed Yozamp’s appearances on the semifinals and finals of Jeopardy! After he won, the staff did not want to let a good story go unreported.

Winthrop Thomas III, Esq. | Crushin’ on Nick Yozamp

Ecologist names WU Republican endangered species

Dr. Andromedus Schmidt, a member of the International Union for Conservation of Nature (IUCN) and an ecology professor in the Wash. U. biology department, has convinced his organization to add Wash. U. Republican to the list of endangered species in light of his recently completed research of the Wash. U. habitat.

Fellatio Hawkins | Super-Senior Political Analyst

Sorority pledge doesn’t love Mommy

Although most pledges of the Mu Omicron Mu (MOM) sorority post Facebook status updates about how much they love their mommies, freshman pledge Mallory Blakely is fed up with the attention that her pledge mommy has given her.

Boney McFingers | Fratty Light Reporter

VIDEO: April 1st reporting

Sasha Fine and Dennis Sweeney ask students about fake happenings at Washington University. They find out what students think about: Esquire magazine’s election of St. Louis as “The South Beach of the Midwest,” the impending removal of the campus’ renowned bunny state, the selection of Ron Jeremy for a post in Women, Gender, and Sexuality Studies, and more!

| Student Life Staff

Urinal is the word on campus

When Phil Pizzonmee was an undergraduate student at Wash. U., it was common for buildings to be named after big donors. Although this practice is still commonplace, unique nooks and crannies are now being named for donors.

American Standard | Chief Pee Pee Correspondent

Students mistaking leggings for pants

The definition of pants at Washington University has disappeared as female students replace traditional pants with leggings. The number of female students going pantless has increased by 200 percent this semester.

Solow Hardtail | Tight Ass Reporter

Orchid Room is more fun than Fun Room

The Orchid Room in the DUC is more fun than the Fun Room, according to a survey sent to undergraduate students. According to the survey, 74 percent of respondents said the Orchid Room was “more fun” or “way more fun” than the Fun Room in the DUC.

Mallard Canard | "El Capitan"

Police Beat | March 31, 2010

A summary of ‘police’ reports leading up to April 1, 2010.

Bruce Wayne

Smoking community frantically draws up ways to get around next year’s smoking ban

With the Washington University smoking ban taking effect this upcoming July, banning all tobacco consumption while on campus property, all student, staff and faculty smokers, snuffers, chewers and dippers are starting to exchange ideas about tobacco usage next year.

Flatland Sanders | Marlboro Cowboy

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