Despite Nietzsche’s genius in his philosophical thought, almost everyone dismisses his thoughts on women. Claiming that if men have a will to power then women necessarily have a will to make men isn’t exactly the best way to convince an audience of this time, let alone attract women in any period (which explains Nietzsche’s eternal celibacy). Nevertheless, one statement he made resonates quite resoundingly in my head and one that I can’t help but feel inclined to agree with—that if a man finds a woman attractive, he cannot be real friends with her.

Of course, such a statement usually ends up with several objections, primarily by women (most men find this intuitive), with things like “I have lots of guy friends!” Perhaps this is the case. There are exactly three situations wherein a guy and a girl can be legitimate friends: if the guy is gay, if the guy does not find you, the woman, attractive or if the guy already has a woman higher than you on his list, either as a prospect or a partner. This, at least in part, reflects the largely common sense conventional wisdom that guys only want one thing. Sometimes conventional wisdom doesn’t necessarily reflect the actual truth, but in this case, it’s spot on. Even academia has caught onto this notion, with fieldwork done in 1994 by sociologist Dallas Lynn confirming the findings. However, most women still doubt, and no amount of empirical proof is going to change this fact. That said, I think a simple hypothetical, a thought experiment if you will, suffices.

Imagine you’re with your guy friend at your house, chatting casually—of course, make sure that he doesn’t fall into the three categories listed above. Then, imagine you excuse yourself, go into the bathroom and completely undress. You then leave the bathroom, and ask him to have sex with you. Would he say that he understands your feelings but wouldn’t want to complicate his relationship with you and would much rather that the two of you remain friends? Or would he, as I think he would, comply? Of course, this thought experiment only works if you’re actually honest with yourself, but I find the former situation highly, highly implausible.

This isn’t to say that guys and gals should only be in serious relationships. It’s perfectly fine to be friends with the opposite sex. However, there’s no way that the relationship will actually be as genuine or sincere as one where the prospect of sex doesn’t constantly get in the way. Guys will always want to have sex with the women whom they’re friends with, and this is just nature. It’s fine that they’ll never actually act on it, but the sex thing is already out there on the table, and consequently the relationship is, for all intents and purposes, doomed. Nietzsche’s views on women may not age the best, but this is one prospect that I think will last indefinitely.