Special Issues

‘I don’t speak broke’: Wrongton, wearing AirPods, addresses divestment

Maintaining that the protestors calling for Washington University to divest from fossil fuels have “no drip,” Chancellor Mark Wrongton announced that the University will not change its investment policies.

Whancellor Chrighton | Staff Reporter

West Campus named most beautiful campus in US by Niche

Citing its “exquisite modern facilities” and “quaint on-campus craft shops,” the university rankings website Niche named Washington University’s West Campus the most beautiful in the United States Thursday.

Seekiswag McBrit | Director of Swag

University responds to student concerns, will also convert Holmes Lounge, Brookings Quad into office space

Beginning in the fall semester, Holmes Lounge and Brookings Quad will be no longer be available for student usage. These transitions come in light of the closure of the Gargoyle and Mallinckrodt 100A in February 2019.

Thotiana JD, PhD | Staff Reporter

LeBron James Jr. commits to Wash. U, pledges to win championship then leave

In a shocking turn of events, LeBron James Jr., son of LeBron James, son of Delonte West, has committed to play basketball at Wash. U.

Hootie Jonas | Hot Take Haver

On ‘Sports,’ Huey Lewis pushes the funk and creep dials to 11

Huey Lewis and the News was at their peak on their 1984 album, “Sports” The album, the band’s commercial breakthrough, is funky and youthful. It’s full of memorable guitar and synth rifts. As a listening experience, the album is pleasant. However, it is an album written by a 34-year-old man for an audience that seems to be much younger than himself, and that creates some cringy moments.

Hootie Jonas | Senior Sports Editor

I don’t know who the WILD artist is, but I’m mad about it

I’m ready to be let down.

Maddy Louds | Angry Person

Staff editorial: The DUC gaslights ducks and we’re all worse for it

Where are the ducks supposed to go if Mudd Field is closed and they aren’t welcome in the DUC?

We’ve got it, please take it: A request to make WU more expensive

Seventy thousand dollars in university fees is simply not enough money, and I find this measly number to be insulting.

Richie McMoneybags | Senior 1 Percenter

Op-ed: Disgusting!

Hello, it is me, an online commenter who’s riled up about something a college newspaper published.

Angry McCentrist | Take Haver

Netflix Deep Mutts with Kujo

Today, dear readers, you hold in your hand the key to the future; a piece of literature that will transcend space and time.

Kujo Ruff-Ruff | Senior Sniff Editor

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