Posts Tagged ‘lost’

Lost: Season Finale

Wednesday, May 13th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

11:00: So they’re all gonna wake up where they started? Right? In LA? And then the whole last season of LOST won’t answer any questions. It will just be like a really long ‘this is what they’re up to now’ episode. I just really want to know who Locke’s doppleganger is….

10:59: Really? That is how LOST is ending? White-on-white credits? I am feeling pretty unsatisfied….

10:56: I think Disco Inferno is still appropriate. Damnit John Locke II. What is happening?!? Who is coming?

10:54: I like Jacob more than John Locke II. Just putting it out there.

10:53: It’s the guy from the beginning of the episode!! What is happening!?

10:53: Why does Jacob have an affinity for rocking chairs? And why does he look so sad?

10:52: Oh, that’s weird. Two John Lockes? Someone brewed up some polyjuice potion, that’s for sure.

10:51: Meeting of the Braintrust?

10:45: It’s Kate and Leo all over again! What were their names on the Titanic? Jack and Rose..

10:44: Good call Radzinkski, try to escape in something metal when it is pretty obvious whatever is in the tunnel is a giant magnet.

10:43: Why is nothing happening?

10:41: I love it when everyone works together. Even it is to detonate a deadly weapon.

10:39: So Jack is actually going to kill everyone while trying to save them. Typical Jack.

10:31: So, when Jack blows up, what is going to happen to future John Locke, Richard, Sun, and Lepidus? They just disappear too? I guess Lock, Sun and Lepidus will just go back from whence they came. I’m hoping Richard will melt Raiders of the Lost Ark style.

10:28: Ohh emm gee, Charlie’s guitar. That’s what got him back to the island.

10:26: Fruit roll up, these Hurley-is-a-fattie jokes never get old.

10:25: Local news is doing a feature on whether on not time travel is possible, be jealous you don’t live in Boston.

10:19: Your talk didn’t go so well, Jack, go so well. God, does being nearly killed make you forget simple English grammar.

10:17: Oh my god, Kate, you are such a homewrecker.

10:11: Man, I didn’t realize how much I’d missed these fight scenes.

10:10: I hope someday a back surgeon will want to blow up a nuke to prove his love for me.

10:06: Don’t worry Jack, Jacob will get you that candy bar…

10:03: Mystery solved! Jacob’s the old woman that lived in the shoe.

9:59: The gang’s back together again!

9:55: Way to put things in perspective, John Locke. It seems LOST is a complex metaphor about the ludicrous antics of religious extremists.

9:52: So who was the guy sitting with Jacob in the beginning?

9:50: I just noticed all I’ve been doing is asking questions. I’m using the Socratic method of course.

9:48: Great, I see something burning, and now I have Disco Inferno stuck in my head: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_sY2rjxq6M Why isn’t this song played more often?

9:46: Wait, so is she faking, she actually knows she’s in Jacob’s cabin?

9:45: Was that ash the smoke monster sleeping?

9:43: Screw Desmond, Rose and Bernard are my constant.

9:42: Sawyer just used the word “kabloomy” or something. And, this light piano music is not an improvement.

9:41: Does one customarily keep their gun in the crotch of her pants. Juliet, don’t shoot off your bajingo.

9:40: Hahahah. BERNARD AND ROSE AND VINCENT! Yay for comic relief.

9:39: Wow, they did such a mediocre job of making the CGI sub and image of the three stooges on the raft mesh together.

9:32: Eloise is going to be pissed. And concussed.

9:30: Also, LOST, would it kill you to throw some brass instruments, or maybe a woodwind or two into your background music.

9:30: And by minor role in everyone’s life. I mean, Jacob just killed the love of Sayid’s life…so, I’m bumping it up to: Jacob played a role in everyone’s life.

9:27: It seems that the scariest part of ‘Drag Me To Hell’ is when the fly crawls up that chick’s nose.

9:22: Juliet wears the pants in that relationship. Literally, because Sawyer is wearing a jumpsuit.

9:21: Ohh, so Jacob played an extremely minor role in everyone’s lives….

9:19: Am I supposed to know who this boy is? Because all the close-ups suggest yes.

9:15: Gwyneth Paltrow’s head is in the box!!! No one will see that coming.

9:13: Really John Locke? We’re going to kill all of the other passengers? Slash, what does lie in the shadow beyond the statue?

9:12: John Locke is Jesus, Richard. Durrrr. That is how he came back to life.

9:11: How is Ben going to throw a wrench the the gear that turns under the island this time? I need him to step up and stop being passive.

9:10: This whole Richard never aging thing makes me forget what he knows and when he knows it.

9:09: Sayid, I will have your babies.

9:07: Jacob, has piercing blue eyes. Also, he did not leave too great an impression on ‘Katie’.

9:06: Katie, please, you sucked even as a 7-year-old.

9:05: Meanwhile, back on the farm….

9:03: And by it’s all coming together now…I mean, what just happened?

9:03: Wow, that guy is pretty frank. HOLY CRAP. JACOB IS WAY MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN I IMAGINED! And way younger and less creepy. And the statue! It’s all coming together now!

9:01: Who are these people? Slash, Somalian pirates on that ship?

9:00: Look’s like we’re in whatever princess was associated with Rumpelstilsken’s room.

Season Finale of LOST. Prepare to get your world knocked on its ass. Then, picked up, dragged back to 1977, and hauled on a submarine that for some reason won’t make it to Ann Arbor.

Read Week: Lost Blog

Wednesday, April 29th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:01: Good previews. But, if they erase the past? Won’t Jin still be the jerk he was when he first saw him. I like new Jin. Not old Jin.

Slash, we just called Lost ending with Flight-815 landing and nothing with the island ever happening. You heard it here first, folks, the last scene of Lost is everyone getting off the airplane in LA.

9:00: ELOISE JUST SHOT DANIEL!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ROFLCOPTERS.

8:59: Why on earth, Daniel, would you enter a hostile camp in a Dharma uniform with your gun drawn?

8:58: Charles: My son too Eloise”. TOTALLY CALLED IT.

8:57: Desmond, I’m going to completely ignore the fact that you are a creep in real life and being sued for sexual harassment, because you and Penny are baller.

8:56: Desmond is fine! Slash, if LOST has taught me anything, it’s don’t leave your son with the nurse….

8:55: Grey’s. Stop existing.

8:54: Been thinking about these “what did you see”s for a good three minutes now. I don’t get it.

8:51: If they stop the plane from crashing, what happens to them in 1977? I hate you Daniel.

8:49: The button did save the world! So, electromagnetism is contained by pressing a button, no button –> plane crash, plane crash –> freighter, frieghter –> Daniel Faraday. Desmond = constant. Everyone else = variables. Man, I really should study harder for this physics test.

8:47: Phil is trapped in the closet! Like R. Kelly! Only minus the midgets.

8:46: Send Daniel through that weird force field thing first. And, if any one of them dies, it better be Daniel. Or Kate. Or best case scenario. Both.

8:45: I always forget Jack’s a doctor.

8:43: OH MY GOD DANIEL. YOU SUCK AT LIFE.  You couldn’t scrunch up your face more if you tried.

8:36: Holy crap, did I accidently change it to TBS? Is Bad Boys on?

8:35: Man, if there was a Dharma: To Catch a Predator, sort of thing, this is where Chris Hansen would bust in with the cameras.

8:34: He’s gonna go find baby Charlotte and be a huge creep.

8:33: Juliet is just enabling Jack to get Kate away from Sawyer. Which is fine, because I prefer them together.

8:32: Jack is taking things into his own hands again. Way to play the Aaron card. Haha, Sawyer, that was a good one, Faraday is H.G. Wells.

8:31: ’Fonzie times.’ Oh, Hurley, that is how everyone describes the 50s.

8:30: Daniel, I can feel no sympathy for you, no matter how many violins are stirring in the background. And Charles is playing you and your mindgrapes with the whole ‘go-to-the-island-for-your-own-benefit’. Oh my god, what if Whitmore is Daniel’s father?!?!?!

8:27: Dan, who are you living with? Who’s at the door? Oh, waddup Charlie Whitmore. Slash, it seems all that time traveling has not been good for your brain. You are really weeping at this plane crash business.

8:26: Missed the second ‘WHAT DID YOU SEE’ but the first was a coffin. And the third was a person surfing. I’m not sure what the game is, but I hope it’s something along the lines of ‘what do these have in common.’

8:22: Yes! Daniel is going to explain everything. Obv, one of the hostiles is his mom. Slash, when will Jin and Sun be reunited. I hoping it’s something to do with a mailbox like that movie with Keanu Reeves and Sandy Bullock.

8:21: Oh snap, knocking on the door during a meeting of the brain trust.

8:20: Anticlimactic, just his journal which he will keep is time-traveling secrets.

8:19: Open the box! Open the box!

8:17: Daniel’s mom is a bitznitch. And Daniel’s hair is worthy of Russell Brand.

8:16: Oh snap, Daniel’s dropping truth bombs.

8:14: Dear Hardee’s, can you make commercials that don’t make me want to vomit?

8:11: “I’m from the future”. …. Definitely as not cool as when Marty McFly said it, Daniel.

8:10: We’ve seen Daniel here before. I totally forget when and why.

8:08: Most charged words about TIME ever. ‘You don’t have TIME…to play piano.’ ‘I will make TIME…to pay piano.’

8:07: Daniel Faraday is autistic! He would totally take Raymond Babbitt in a toothpick counting competition.

8:06: Notice the metronome in the background….she just stopped time.

8:03: Way to incorporate Star Trek into the LOST title scene, J.J. Abrams. Slash, yeah, I don’t know what that giant lobster spider is, but it sure stands out in the tundra.

8:02: There’s something off about Daniel, and the weird way he tilts his head when he speaks.

8:00: What happened to Desmond? He looked totally fine when he tackled Ben. Man, their child is adorable.

Oh hey, 100th episode of LOST.

Lost Blog Volume 2!

Wednesday, April 15th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:02: S: TWO WEEKS? Nooo! Oh, Hannah’s just changed it to The Cougar’. On TV Land. Fingers crossed the cougar is Bea Arthur.

9:01: H: Oh, there it is. Long time no see indeed, Faraday.

9:00: S: Where is the WTF moment, Lost?

8:59: S: So LOST is just J.J. Abrams huge pitch to George Lucas for the next Start Wars movie?

8:51: S: Punching a guy and tying him up: That’s the Sawyer I know and love.

8:50: H: Hurley, don’t let an old man named Biff get a hold of your journal. He wreaked some havoc with a Sports Almanac a few years back.

8:49: S: Oh My God. Hurley wrote Star Wars!

8:48: S: I hope adult Miles will get to hold baby Miles…

8:47: H: Seems like he’s with Ben. He’s certainly cocky enough. Not nearly creepy enough, though.

8:46: S: Who is this guy? Slash, what lies in the shadow of the statue?

8:45: S: Legit, I do not want to watch her actually licking herself.

8:44: H: This Hardee’s commercial makes me physically ill. Beautiful lady walking through a farmer’s market who proceeds to pig out disgustingly on an oozing burger. Makes me hungry, of course.

8:39: S: Building the Hatch. (Sidenote: Hannah is saying these numbers out loud).

8:38: S: Baby Miles and adult Miles are in the same location!?!

8:36: H: This is Roger: “I hate you, Jack. Go away. Now let me confide in you about my conspiracy theories.”

8:34: S: I think Captain and Tennille’s relationship are symbolic of Hurley and Miles’.

8:29: S: Haha, douche. Fun fact, Hannah only recently told me how to spell that word correctly. Deutsch does not equal Douche. Unless it was circa 1943. Or David Hasselhoff.

8:28: H: 1. They can say douche on TV??? 2. Dr. Chang is Miles’ dad! Good job, Steph.

8:27: S: Dr. Chang, more like Dr. Asshole.

8:26: H: Sometimes I get the feeling that Hurley is not crazy, he’s just kind of stupid.

8:25: S: Han, that is why we are biffs. Also, Captain and Tennille! At least they went back to solid music.

8:24: H: Kate, stop flirting with Ben’s dad. It’s creepy. And you’re a whore. And once again, why do you want to save Ben’s life? I will never understand.

8:23: S: 1. Miles, I could totally pull the ‘your-dead-son-loved-you-now-give-me-three-grand’. 2. Oh, hey Naomi.

8:21: S: There is no way Hurley can talk to dead people…that’s just some latent crazy.

8:20: H: Death by filling? Sux. Not a glamorous way to go.

8:19: S: Oh Hurley, that is not flatulence, that is a corpse.

8:14: S: Real convincing, Juliet.

8:13: S: My technical related difficulties are over! Slash, Dr. Chang? Miles dad? Or me being racist?

8:12: H: Okay, not so anti-climactic anymore. Miles’ dad’s body is totally on the Island!

8:12: H: The music right now does not fit this very anti-climactic moment.

8:10: H: Miles is sooo punk rock right now. Skunk hair is always in style.

8:03: H: Way to use a nondescript Asian child to represent Miles, Lost people.

Lost: Live Blog

Wednesday, April 8th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:02 S: That would be the most atrocious ending of a television show ever. Also, Miles? He’s the missing piece? Hmm…Joan of Arcadia is an undercover prostitute right now on ABC’s “The Unusuals.”

9:00 H: At least Ben didn’t get off that easy. Also, I can’t shake the suspicion that this entire show takes plac in Locke’s head as he sits in his wheelchair unable to go on the walkabout.

8:58 S: The smoke monster would make the worst host of “This Is Your Life.”

8:57 S: “They’re treasure was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure.” Shut your eyes Ben! If you can’t see it, it can’t turn you into a skeleton.

8:56 S: Eagerly anticipating the typical last wtf two minutes of LOST.

8:55 S: Ben, way to not love your stolen daughter. Also, I’m pretty sure Indiana Jones has been in that temple.

8:54 H: I don’t think this bitch knows what lies in the shadow of the statue. Could they have the sickness that Danielle’s people had? Or was that just imagined by her already-psychotic mind?

8:53 S: New Annalucia, what the eff are you talking about.

8:52 S: Oh, you. Because Desmond is The Constant. Speaking of constants, where in God’s name as Faraday gone?

8:50 H: Desmond and Penny are the one thing that HAS to remain constant.

8:48 S: And now we know why Ben showed up at the dock wrecked.

8:47 S: BEN. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU.

8:47 H: If Ben killed Penny, I will…..I will do the equivalent of murdering a fictional character. Not sure what that is yet.

8:45 S: This is where Ben was taken and ‘never the same again’. The Temple.

8:44 S: Ben, get over the fact that you can’t speak to ‘Jacob.’ Oh, how the tables have turned.

8:44 H: Also, what does dying feel like. How did you break out of the coffin? So many questions.

8:43 H: Oh, so you’re the same man you’ve always been, Locke? And who might that be?

8:41 S: Because Locke totally is. Ben is that kid in high school that forces himself into your group of friends and everyone just says okay because they are secretly afraid of him.

8:40 H: I love when Locke one-ups Ben and makes him ponder whether Locke is the true prophet of the island.

8:40 S: Also, totally called Ben shooting Caesar.

8:38 S: Ben is off his game tonight. Also, Sayid shot him in the past, but here he is playing mental Stratego with Ben.

8:37 H: Hearing Ben say he’s scared doesn’t give me the satisfaction I thought it would.

8:36 S: Ben totally wanted to sic that smoke monster on Locke.

8:35 S: Alex is dead. Ben is fighting the inevitable. What is this island??

8:34 S: So we never saw this hostile takeover of the Dharma initiative. And here’s the Charles I know and fear.

8:33 H: I find it hard to believe that Ben, who literally controls the black smoke monster, would have no name for it. Really? Seriously, really?

8:32 S: Ben has no idea what is happening. This is great.

8:31 S: Where is Hurley to explain everything about time travel and Marty McFly to me?!

8:28 S: If there is a God, and he doesn’t sound like Morgan Freeman. I’m going to be pretty disappointed.

8:26 S: Sun and Lepidus had a nice game of RISK going. Symbolic of something? Probably not.

8:25 H: Locke’s tone suggests that he is orchestrating this whole thing. What a Ben move!

8:23 H: As he ages, Widmore gets more and more Australian. Also, he looks a lot better without hair.

8:21 H: I like that they can joke about Ben’s attempted murder of Locke. Not too soon, apparently.

8:17 H: I’ll never get over the swelling music. The show wouldn’t be half as suspenseful without it.

8:16 S: Ben, I hate slash admire you.

8:15 H: Locke’s calling his bluff.

8:14 S: God, you can never tell with Ben. He’s lying. He’s totally lying. And it obv didn’t work if you guys are separated by thirty effing years.

8:13 S: Ben is a quick one.

8:11 H: Reminiscent of when they tried to steal Aaron. So that’s where Ethan learned is baby-snatching abilities.

8:10 H: I am literally laughing out loud at this cub scout hairdo and ascot. And ETHAN.

8:10 S: Ben, or Brutus?

8:08  S: Ben is such a tricky beast.

8:04. Steph: Finally, a smoke-monster centric episode.

8:03: Hannah: He doesn’t sound Australian!

Oh hey everyone.

Hannah, TV editor, and I, Cadenza editor, are trying out this whole live blog business while we watch LOST. So prepare to get your world rocked by how little we know about this show after watching it for a good 4 years now.