Scott BresslerLast week, I decided that it was time for me to get in shape. I hadn’t worked out in probably a decade. What was once a tight, cute and well-toned body had become flabby and slightly grotesque-it was still pretty cute, though.
Anyway, I entered our University’s state-of-the-art facilities, descended the staircase and went into the men’s locker room. Almost immediately, I saw something that I had long forgotten-butt-naked old men wandering around.
I returned to my fond memories of being a prepubescent boy at the Jewish Community Center (JCC) locker room and getting a chance to view countless nude geriatrics flaunt their amazing bodies in front of anyone who had the ability to see.
What a great and often not discussed benefit of staying healthy! In a way, my mental health was improved by seeing these men. They walked around freely, not embarrassed by their aged bodies. They knew, in their hearts, that there is nothing that males like seeing more than other males, particularly older ones, fully nude.
What’s better than seeing old men walk around naked? Watching them lather up and clean themselves. No need for shower curtains! They’re only nuisances.
What’s so great about this long-held practice of the locker room is that naked old guys aren’t few and far between-they’re everywhere! It’s impossible to avert your eyes, because at every turn, there they are. How amazing is that?
I’m so happy to learn that this locker room feature exists beyond the JCC. My only fear is that the practice is generational. I hope that it continues when the next generation reaches old age, and I can’t wait until I’m an old man.
When I’m an old man, I will make a firm commitment to go to a men’s locker room every day to walk around, shower and do who-knows-what-else completely naked-even if I’m not planning on working out. I want to make sure that the young boys of the future have the same opportunities that I had, and I’m going to do my best to ensure it.
Who’s with me?
Mister Fantasy is a freshman, but he loves to look at seniors. He can be found in the men’s locker room with his eyes wide open and can be reached via e-mail at [email protected].
This is so true! They are in every locker room. Especially any locker room that has a steam shower. I don’t think they like the suana’s too much.
And you NEVER see them work out. As if there is some urban legend floating around that sitting in a steam room will melt away your fat.
I think most of them are just there to check everyone out. they will STAY for hours. I would go work out–2 to 2 1/2 hours, come back and they would still be in there.
Its like DUDE! Go work out!
There needs to be an instructor in there monitoring and if the fat guy spends more than 20 minutes in the locker they have to work out or leave.