Archive for the ‘Take on TV’ Category

Newer Entries »

FlashForward

Monday, September 28th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

Approximately five years ago, I watched a man wake up in a jungle, run as fast as he could towards a beach, and survey the terrible carnage that was waiting for him once he got there. Luckily, this was not a real-life experience. I was watching the opening moments of “Lost.” “Lost” has shaped my television viewing experience, but sadly, it will be ending this May. ABC has been searching for the next “Lost” for a long time, and I think they have finally found in Thursday’s new show, “FlashForward”.

Thursday’s pilot episode opens with Mark Benford (Joseph Fiennes) waking up from a terrible car wreck. As he climbs out of the car to stand up, there is nothing good to see. Every single car on the highway has crashed, sirens are going off everywhere, and people are on fire. Like “Lost,” it is the aftermath of a completely terrible accident.

Soon, we watch most of our main characters going about their lives before the crash. We follow Mark into Alcoholics Anonymous and watch an unknown man on the verge of killing himself. We learn that Mark is an FBI agent, and his wife, Olivia (Sonya Walger) is a surgeon. And then, we see the crash happen.

But it’s not an ordinary crash. It’s a global disaster. Every single person on the planet passes out simultaneously for 2 minutes and 17 seconds. Millions of people die. During the blackout, we see into Mark’s consciousness as he experiences a memory. It is April 29, 2010, and someone who wants to kill him is chasing him inside his office.

April 2010 hasn’t happened yet, obviously, and that is where the title of the show comes from. During the blackout, most of the main characters experience a flashforward to this one moment in time. Those who saw nothing should be worried. Mark remembers that during his flashforward, he was trying to solve a particular case: what caused the flashforward itself.
“FlashForward”, like “Lost”, is a serial drama that focuses on many characters whose lives will all eventually intersect. As we meet the main characters, we begin to see the far-reaching effects of what the flashfoward means. Demetrei (John Cho), Mark’s partner, saw absolutely nothing when he blacked out. Olivia saw herself in love with another man who she has not even met. Some people saw good things in the future. Others saw nothing of particular importance.

It is rare for a pilot episode to captivate my attention as quickly as this did. In only 42 minutes, it introduces a handful of characters and many storylines. The cast all seems perfectly suited to their roles, and even though Joseph Fiennes and Sonya Walger are foreign, their American accents in this show are flawless. Like “Lost,” about a million questions were asked, but “FlashFoward” actually started to answer them. By the end of the pilot, we learned what most of the main characters had flashed about, and I’m so interested in finding out how they will get there. “FlashForward” seems like it is going to end every episode on a cliffhanger, which is frustratingly awesome. At the end of the pilot, we learned that there was one man in Michigan who didn’t succumb to the blackouts. Who is he? Why did he stay conscious? Hopefully, the show will answer these questions soon.

“FlashForward” made a few blatant references to “Lost,” clearly trying to pick up the same audience. They showed a billboard for Oceanic Airlines as well as a kangaroo wandering around downtown LA, belonging just as much as that polar bear did in that jungle. Olivia’s portrayer, Sonya Walger, plays Penny on “Lost,” and I’m sure most “Lost” fans will be excited in a few episodes when Dominic Monaghan (Charlie) shows up.

From the pilot, “FlashForward” appears to be asking some really important philosophical questions. Does fate exist? If we know what is supposed to happen, can we change the future? What does all this mean? I, for one, am very excited to find out. “FlashForward” airs on Thursdays, 7 central, on ABC. You won’t regret tuning in.
-Andie Hutner

Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | No Comments »

CADENZA BLOGS THE EMMY AWARDS

Sunday, September 20th, 2009 | Steph Spera

Neil Patrick Harris is glorious.

I love when stars feign embarrassment as the camera pans on them.

Requisite Paula Abdul joke.

Jon Hamm you are gorgeous.

NPH – you are phenomenal, I put down the remote.

Funny bit on LOST. NPH, I’m feeling your monologue.

Yes, nice touch with the Kanye joke.

Hmm, this changing the stage thing is pretty cool.

Also, note, I love montages!

Yes! The fire scene from The Office!

And the scene with Jon Hamm and Liz Limmon! Perfect ending scene.

I would willingly be in a threesome with Tina Fey and Jon Hamm.

Jon Hamm. You are a god. Zeus himself sculpted you.

Way to go, Seth, with the F-bomb.

Okay, let’s just discuss how I can’t stop staring at Mr. Hamm. With your beautiful bowtie and your chiseled jaw…

Kristen Chenowith, you are fabulous.

What’s with the glasses! This is GREAT!!!

A monocle!

Okay, that threesome stands with Amy Poehler and Will Arnette too.

Vanessa Williams. I am sad about your lack of glasses!

Holy crap! Kristin, well-deserved!! You are adorable and hilarious and I would hire you despite looking like you fell into a pile of broken mirrors.

143 Pushing Daisies!!! We watched you!!

Emmy’s, I am really feeling this new format.

I am also enjoying the color commentating. Way to go PC!

Dear cast of How I Met Your Mother, I want to live your fictional life.

Also, the two baby mammas are lookin fine.

And dear Jason Segal, marry me.

Obviously, 30 rock, though, that was such a good episode. Liz Lemmon was a Mean Girl.

Haha, Matt Hubbard, majoring in history at Harvard, proving to all history majors you can do anything … if you go to Harvard.

Harlem Globetrotters, where have you been all my life, way to acknowledge the mediocrity of that joke, NPH.

Amy and Julia, you are all fabulous. Everyone is fabulous.

Tracy, win, just for the speech.

Duckie. Lame. Kevin Dillon is going to kick your ass in the parking lot.

Although, Jon Cryer, that was a good joke. And your sweater vest is hilarious.

Justin, I will make you laugh, I swear.

Bea Arthur, Repsect!

Sarah Silverman! You’re mustache is very dapper.

Toni Collette, well deserved! I’ve been a fan of you since Muriel’s Wedding. But, your speech was boring.

NPH, keep bringing up this Jon Cryer thing. I’m loving it.

Leighton and Blake, you don’t look as pretty as usual. And I feel better somehow.

Justin, you were the highlight of SNL last season, and I could just listen to Tina Fey talk forever.

That was a weird bit with the directors. Weird but enjoyable.

Rob Lowe, you have a grand jaw.

As much as I love Alec, I was hoping for Steve or Jermaine.

Lorne, this is your night.

Oh yes, 10 minutes have passed and this Family Guy joke is still going.

God, the reality award speeches are going to be the worst. And our TV Editor will actually punch a baby if Tom Bergeron gets recognized in any way.

Amazing Race, you proved that deaf people can be total tools too. Slash, Real Housewives of New Jersey, thank you for existing this summer, and making me never want to hear the word ‘bubbies’ again.

Hannah: Who’s the celebrity? The fringe on those pants is ridiculous.

What is this dance? If only you picked a better song. Pee break!

Babies, beware, reality show host category is up.

Oh, Jeff Probst – way to be a good sport about your fiasco as 1/5th of the host last year. (note, babies, you are safe.)

Probst, when you run out of islands in the South Pacific, just go on tour as a motivational speaker.

Tracy Morgan. Be everything I want you to be and more.

Tray, I love ya.

Amazing Race deaf kid, you are an ass.

Way to open that gracefully Tray. Also, 1 person reading this blog, Hannah Schwartz, TV Editor and I will be on the Amazing Race someday.

Finally, I can put a face to the name Bertram VanMunster.

Sadly, I have watched 0 mini series that do no involve the BBC and Jane Austen.

Way to go Grey Gardens guy, you are with it, with your topical awards show references. Sir, I don’t know your name, but you are giving a wonderful speech! There is a single tear running down my cheek.

Mad-Eye Moody!

Patricia Arquette, what in gods name is that on exoskeleton on your body.

The Accountants, everyone’s favorite part of the show.

Yes! Dr. Horrible. Okay, NPH, host everything on every channel forever. And Nathan Filion! This bit about the internet is actually clever.

Also, more good news, Eli Manning and the suckfest that are the Giants are currently getting beat by the Cowboys. Keep it up boys!

Jessica Lange – your shout out to Drew just makes her more adorable, and, look, Mac is here too.

Variety Category. These montages are great.

Coldplay and Viva la Vida, now we’re getting serious.

This category is just everything else that has ever appeared on tv that isn’t a drama or comedy or reality show.

Is his suit jacket leather?

What does that tractor even mean? Why is that a back-up plan?

Conan, that was cute. Oh my gosh, Billy Crystal, where have you been? I want another City Slickers 2.

Also, the writers of SNL are my age. Why aren’t I writing for SNL? If you’re reading this blog, don’t answer that.

Eli Manning, why were you in that commercial? I hate you.

Jimmy Fallon and autotune. Giggles.

The Muppetts! That Oscar opening number was intense.Please Flight of the Conchordss!!!!

Wow, this category is great.l JT is nominated all over the place.

Probably the only musical number I didn’t want to win….

Okay, new respect for you, self-depreciating guy, a joke and shout out to Flight of the Conchords.

Hannah (on Mr. Gervais): He should be knighted.

Ricky Gervais, my face hurts from smiling. You are brilliant. And your pseudo-feud with Steve Carrell is also magical.

So bowties are in. And I’m hoping Flansie is his dog.

DRAMA.

Sam Waterston? You’re still on TV. What’s happening with robot insurance. And eww Katherine Heigel, there is a reason, and by a reason, I mean 37,401,471,431 reasons why you’re on our women we hate wall.

JULIETTTTTTT!!!!

Also, note how short the Mad Men clip was because they are going to sweep this entire section.

Ben Linus won.

Hannah:  Ewww, I just saw Charlotte.

^I second that.

I only watch Lost and Mad Men. So, yeahhhh, supporting actress means nothing to me.

What’s happening? What’s gong on?

Obviously Sarah McLachlan to do what is to be the longest In Memoriam in Emmy history.

Paying respect. And crying. My tear ducts are leakier than average I think.

Hannah, as I’m crying: Who’s doing the doobiedumdum part? Seriously? It’s not Sarah.

Chewing gum, True Blood guy-not classy.

Michael J. Fox, you are truly an inspiration.

Matthew Weiner, you are all over the place.

And now on stage, making kidney transplant jokes.

In ten years, we’re going to look back at these glasses, and cry. Like Hannah said, they unknowingly followed the trend of the Best Supporting Actresses.

Peggssss!!!! My favorite Mad Men clip!

Cruella DeVille, seriously, I was rooting for you Betsy Moss.

Glasses.

Holy frick!! Jon Hamm lost – and looks sad.  And Frankie Muniz’ dad won. I should really start watching this show. I hear it’s wonderful. Well, at least AMC got a win.

The big 2! Drama and Comedy! And Bob Newhart! I love exclamation points.

The only thing better than Tina Fey making out with Jon Hamm has gotta be Tina Fey making out with Bob Newhart, who generating way more than just repsect-laughter.

MAKE OUT! MAKE OUT!

“That was a nail biter.” Was that sarcastic? You are a goddess. Grizz and DotCom are up there! And Josh Gerard. The gang’s back together. I can’t wait til October 15th…

Sigourney Weaver, why are you here? And why isn’t there an alien popping out of your stomach? Sorry, that’s the only movie with Sigourney I’ve sat through – besides Baby Mama, but that was just a movie with Sigourney Weaver, not a Sigourney Weaver movie.

If Mad Men doesn’t win, I will freak, what a good theme song. (Also, anyone who’s ever seen Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang, it’s eerily similar to their opening credits)

Elizabeth Moss and Fred Armisen are the most adorable couple. This is the most beautiful collection of people (minus Matthew Weiner) I have ever seen.

Where’s Ken Cosgrove? Where’ my boy?

NPH, you did a magnificent job. Okay, and now onto the multitudes of homework I put off this weekend. Cadenza, you are ruining my gpa.

Tags:, , , , ,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | 3 Comments »

That’s My Show?

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

So I’m watching Sunday Night Football on NBC (boring game, by the way. Cutler needs to step it up), and the commercials hit. There’s something about Bud Light, maybe that VISA spot where Morgan Freeman tells everyone to dance, and then this hits:

Low lights.  Calming music. And then things brighten.  Lights are pouring, literally pouring out of the sides of the frame. And everything moves in slow-motion as Pam smiles at the camera. Excuse me if this isn’t verbatim, as I don’t have a perfect memory, and I couldn’t find the promo on YouTube, but just as Pam flashes her pearly whites and Amy Poehler gives us a close-mouthed grin, the voice-over guy says (approximately), “Come to NBC Thursday Night, and smile with us.”

Shudder. Uggggh. Double Shudder.

Can this really be NBC’s ad campaign for what is supposed to be their tour de force of comedy? I sympathize with NBC, I really do. My two favorite comedies, “30 Rock” and “The Office” are on NBC, and it’s a shame they’re perpetually ratings-challenged. NBC has a ditch to climb out of, but this is not the way to do it.

I can’t think of one time “The Office” showed a scene in slow-motion, or with halo lighting, for that matter. “The Office” is a show about an awkward work space that’s fueled by the antics of a crazy, though well-intentioned, boss, and is humanized by Jim’s and Pam’s relationship. It’s not about the sentimental moments and the “ah, shucks” cheery smiles. “Parks and Recreation,” flawed as it may be, is a scathing satire of bureaucracy; you won’t find a touchy-feely moment in the show that isn’t followed by a joke about paper-pushing minutiae.

NBC isn’t going to fool any returning viewers with these ads, and if they manage to attract new viewers, they’ll instantly change the channel once they realize that “The Office” actually isn’t a primetime revival of “Leave it to Beaver.” Advertise what you have, NBC, don’t pretend your shows have been plucked out of the last-third of “Evan Almighty.”

And when the heck is “30 Rock” coming back? Sheesh.

-Percy Olsen

Tags:, , ,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | No Comments »

Project Runway, or as I like to call it, the ‘Where are Epperson and Qristyl?…Show’

Thursday, September 3rd, 2009 | Steph Spera

8:22: Cadenza is back and live blogging Project Runway. So hurry up back from MOOD and if you still have homework to do, well, you have less than 40 minutes to ‘make it work.’

8:58: It’s starting soon, it’s starting soon!

9:00: Recap of last week’s show. Poor Malvin. Mitchell should have been sent home week 1.

9:02: This season wins for best contestant names, Ra’mon, Malvin, Epperson, Qristyl, Gordana, Althea, it goes on….

9:03: Beach day! Tim Gunn is looking fabulous in khaki’s and flip flops.

9:04: Surf ware was too easy, yay for throwing in team challenge. Shiz is gonna go down.

9:06: Qristyl and Epperson are a team!! Also, from this point on, Louise will be known as Diablo Cody.

9:12: Design a second look! Capital WTF!

9:13: Tyler Perry, stop making movies! Who keeps funding this, we need to have a long talk. Also, Schick Quattro, the commercial where you trim the triangular bush. Not okay. Not okay even a little bit.

9:16: Avante garde challenge, where are Christian and Chris March when we need them.

9:18: And Carol Hannah will be known as either Clarissa or Melissa Joan Heart (MJH).

9:19: Mitchell, how did you get on this show? I can sew better than you. Also, loving the lace ass-less chaps Nicolas.

9:21: Poor MJH. You’re model is now working for Arby’s.

9:25: ” I feel like I’m in a cartoon with a superhero and Greek goddess.” = If Mitchell doesn’t get kicked off today, I am going to stop watching this show. (Sort of).

9:27: The best parts about the previews for the Georgia O’Keefe Lifetime movie are the giant pictures of vaginas.

9:28: Also, Sandy Bullock, why must you keep making ridiculous movies. I want to like you!

9:30: Mitchell saw something shiny. And he’s distracted for 8 minutes.

9:32: Ra’mon, I am freaking out for you!!!

9:39: That was about 5 minutes of bad advertising.

RUNWAY SHOW:

I see some booty, Epperson.

Interesting hand dye job, Ra’mon.

Way to go MJH and girl I always confuse with other girl.

Diablo, your mad design skills were just bananas, homezskillet.

HOLY GOD, a mermaid-tranny-prostitue from the future just walked the runway!!!

Judging:

Oh my god Mitchell, how in god’s name are you in the top two. Ra’mon, you made it work.

Kick his ass, Heidi, you kick Mitchell’s ass!

Can you send someone home even though you are in the top two? Mitchell. Mitchell. I hate your existence.

Oh no! Either Epperson or Qristyl is going home! They are why I watch that show.

These subtitles are sort of insulting.

9:50: </strong

Tags:,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | Comments Closed

Lost: Season Finale

Wednesday, May 13th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

11:00: So they’re all gonna wake up where they started? Right? In LA? And then the whole last season of LOST won’t answer any questions. It will just be like a really long ‘this is what they’re up to now’ episode. I just really want to know who Locke’s doppleganger is….

10:59: Really? That is how LOST is ending? White-on-white credits? I am feeling pretty unsatisfied….

10:56: I think Disco Inferno is still appropriate. Damnit John Locke II. What is happening?!? Who is coming?

10:54: I like Jacob more than John Locke II. Just putting it out there.

10:53: It’s the guy from the beginning of the episode!! What is happening!?

10:53: Why does Jacob have an affinity for rocking chairs? And why does he look so sad?

10:52: Oh, that’s weird. Two John Lockes? Someone brewed up some polyjuice potion, that’s for sure.

10:51: Meeting of the Braintrust?

10:45: It’s Kate and Leo all over again! What were their names on the Titanic? Jack and Rose..

10:44: Good call Radzinkski, try to escape in something metal when it is pretty obvious whatever is in the tunnel is a giant magnet.

10:43: Why is nothing happening?

10:41: I love it when everyone works together. Even it is to detonate a deadly weapon.

10:39: So Jack is actually going to kill everyone while trying to save them. Typical Jack.

10:31: So, when Jack blows up, what is going to happen to future John Locke, Richard, Sun, and Lepidus? They just disappear too? I guess Lock, Sun and Lepidus will just go back from whence they came. I’m hoping Richard will melt Raiders of the Lost Ark style.

10:28: Ohh emm gee, Charlie’s guitar. That’s what got him back to the island.

10:26: Fruit roll up, these Hurley-is-a-fattie jokes never get old.

10:25: Local news is doing a feature on whether on not time travel is possible, be jealous you don’t live in Boston.

10:19: Your talk didn’t go so well, Jack, go so well. God, does being nearly killed make you forget simple English grammar.

10:17: Oh my god, Kate, you are such a homewrecker.

10:11: Man, I didn’t realize how much I’d missed these fight scenes.

10:10: I hope someday a back surgeon will want to blow up a nuke to prove his love for me.

10:06: Don’t worry Jack, Jacob will get you that candy bar…

10:03: Mystery solved! Jacob’s the old woman that lived in the shoe.

9:59: The gang’s back together again!

9:55: Way to put things in perspective, John Locke. It seems LOST is a complex metaphor about the ludicrous antics of religious extremists.

9:52: So who was the guy sitting with Jacob in the beginning?

9:50: I just noticed all I’ve been doing is asking questions. I’m using the Socratic method of course.

9:48: Great, I see something burning, and now I have Disco Inferno stuck in my head: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_sY2rjxq6M Why isn’t this song played more often?

9:46: Wait, so is she faking, she actually knows she’s in Jacob’s cabin?

9:45: Was that ash the smoke monster sleeping?

9:43: Screw Desmond, Rose and Bernard are my constant.

9:42: Sawyer just used the word “kabloomy” or something. And, this light piano music is not an improvement.

9:41: Does one customarily keep their gun in the crotch of her pants. Juliet, don’t shoot off your bajingo.

9:40: Hahahah. BERNARD AND ROSE AND VINCENT! Yay for comic relief.

9:39: Wow, they did such a mediocre job of making the CGI sub and image of the three stooges on the raft mesh together.

9:32: Eloise is going to be pissed. And concussed.

9:30: Also, LOST, would it kill you to throw some brass instruments, or maybe a woodwind or two into your background music.

9:30: And by minor role in everyone’s life. I mean, Jacob just killed the love of Sayid’s life…so, I’m bumping it up to: Jacob played a role in everyone’s life.

9:27: It seems that the scariest part of ‘Drag Me To Hell’ is when the fly crawls up that chick’s nose.

9:22: Juliet wears the pants in that relationship. Literally, because Sawyer is wearing a jumpsuit.

9:21: Ohh, so Jacob played an extremely minor role in everyone’s lives….

9:19: Am I supposed to know who this boy is? Because all the close-ups suggest yes.

9:15: Gwyneth Paltrow’s head is in the box!!! No one will see that coming.

9:13: Really John Locke? We’re going to kill all of the other passengers? Slash, what does lie in the shadow beyond the statue?

9:12: John Locke is Jesus, Richard. Durrrr. That is how he came back to life.

9:11: How is Ben going to throw a wrench the the gear that turns under the island this time? I need him to step up and stop being passive.

9:10: This whole Richard never aging thing makes me forget what he knows and when he knows it.

9:09: Sayid, I will have your babies.

9:07: Jacob, has piercing blue eyes. Also, he did not leave too great an impression on ‘Katie’.

9:06: Katie, please, you sucked even as a 7-year-old.

9:05: Meanwhile, back on the farm….

9:03: And by it’s all coming together now…I mean, what just happened?

9:03: Wow, that guy is pretty frank. HOLY CRAP. JACOB IS WAY MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN I IMAGINED! And way younger and less creepy. And the statue! It’s all coming together now!

9:01: Who are these people? Slash, Somalian pirates on that ship?

9:00: Look’s like we’re in whatever princess was associated with Rumpelstilsken’s room.

Season Finale of LOST. Prepare to get your world knocked on its ass. Then, picked up, dragged back to 1977, and hauled on a submarine that for some reason won’t make it to Ann Arbor.

Tags:, ,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | No Comments »

Read Week: Lost Blog

Wednesday, April 29th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:01: Good previews. But, if they erase the past? Won’t Jin still be the jerk he was when he first saw him. I like new Jin. Not old Jin.

Slash, we just called Lost ending with Flight-815 landing and nothing with the island ever happening. You heard it here first, folks, the last scene of Lost is everyone getting off the airplane in LA.

9:00: ELOISE JUST SHOT DANIEL!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ROFLCOPTERS.

8:59: Why on earth, Daniel, would you enter a hostile camp in a Dharma uniform with your gun drawn?

8:58: Charles: “My son too Eloise”. TOTALLY CALLED IT.

8:57: Desmond, I’m going to completely ignore the fact that you are a creep in real life and being sued for sexual harassment, because you and Penny are baller.

8:56: Desmond is fine! Slash, if LOST has taught me anything, it’s don’t leave your son with the nurse….

8:55: Grey’s. Stop existing.

8:54: Been thinking about these “what did you see”s for a good three minutes now. I don’t get it.

8:51: If they stop the plane from crashing, what happens to them in 1977? I hate you Daniel.

8:49: The button did save the world! So, electromagnetism is contained by pressing a button, no button –> plane crash, plane crash –> freighter, frieghter –> Daniel Faraday. Desmond = constant. Everyone else = variables. Man, I really should study harder for this physics test.

8:47: Phil is trapped in the closet! Like R. Kelly! Only minus the midgets.

8:46: Send Daniel through that weird force field thing first. And, if any one of them dies, it better be Daniel. Or Kate. Or best case scenario. Both.

8:45: I always forget Jack’s a doctor.

8:43: OH MY GOD DANIEL. YOU SUCK AT LIFE.  You couldn’t scrunch up your face more if you tried.

8:36: Holy crap, did I accidently change it to TBS? Is Bad Boys on?

8:35: Man, if there was a Dharma: To Catch a Predator, sort of thing, this is where Chris Hansen would bust in with the cameras.

8:34: He’s gonna go find baby Charlotte and be a huge creep.

8:33: Juliet is just enabling Jack to get Kate away from Sawyer. Which is fine, because I prefer them together.

8:32: Jack is taking things into his own hands again. Way to play the Aaron card. Haha, Sawyer, that was a good one, Faraday is H.G. Wells.

8:31: ’Fonzie times.’ Oh, Hurley, that is how everyone describes the 50s.

8:30: Daniel, I can feel no sympathy for you, no matter how many violins are stirring in the background. And Charles is playing you and your mindgrapes with the whole ‘go-to-the-island-for-your-own-benefit’. Oh my god, what if Whitmore is Daniel’s father?!?!?!

8:27: Dan, who are you living with? Who’s at the door? Oh, waddup Charlie Whitmore. Slash, it seems all that time traveling has not been good for your brain. You are really weeping at this plane crash business.

8:26: Missed the second ‘WHAT DID YOU SEE’ but the first was a coffin. And the third was a person surfing. I’m not sure what the game is, but I hope it’s something along the lines of ‘what do these have in common.’

8:22: Yes! Daniel is going to explain everything. Obv, one of the hostiles is his mom. Slash, when will Jin and Sun be reunited. I hoping it’s something to do with a mailbox like that movie with Keanu Reeves and Sandy Bullock.

8:21: Oh snap, knocking on the door during a meeting of the brain trust.

8:20: Anticlimactic, just his journal which he will keep is time-traveling secrets.

8:19: Open the box! Open the box!

8:17: Daniel’s mom is a bitznitch. And Daniel’s hair is worthy of Russell Brand.

8:16: Oh snap, Daniel’s dropping truth bombs.

8:14: Dear Hardee’s, can you make commercials that don’t make me want to vomit?

8:11: “I’m from the future”. …. Definitely as not cool as when Marty McFly said it, Daniel.

8:10: We’ve seen Daniel here before. I totally forget when and why.

8:08: Most charged words about TIME ever. ‘You don’t have TIME…to play piano.’ ‘I will make TIME…to pay piano.’

8:07: Daniel Faraday is autistic! He would totally take Raymond Babbitt in a toothpick counting competition.

8:06: Notice the metronome in the background….she just stopped time.

8:03: Way to incorporate Star Trek into the LOST title scene, J.J. Abrams. Slash, yeah, I don’t know what that giant lobster spider is, but it sure stands out in the tundra.

8:02: There’s something off about Daniel, and the weird way he tilts his head when he speaks.

8:00: What happened to Desmond? He looked totally fine when he tackled Ben. Man, their child is adorable.

Oh hey, 100th episode of LOST.

Tags:,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | 1 Comment »

Lost Blog Volume 2!

Wednesday, April 15th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:02: S: TWO WEEKS? Nooo! Oh, Hannah’s just changed it to The Cougar’. On TV Land. Fingers crossed the cougar is Bea Arthur.

9:01: H: Oh, there it is. Long time no see indeed, Faraday.

9:00: S: Where is the WTF moment, Lost?

8:59: S: So LOST is just J.J. Abrams huge pitch to George Lucas for the next Start Wars movie?

8:51: S: Punching a guy and tying him up: That’s the Sawyer I know and love.

8:50: H: Hurley, don’t let an old man named Biff get a hold of your journal. He wreaked some havoc with a Sports Almanac a few years back.

8:49: S: Oh My God. Hurley wrote Star Wars!

8:48: S: I hope adult Miles will get to hold baby Miles…

8:47: H: Seems like he’s with Ben. He’s certainly cocky enough. Not nearly creepy enough, though.

8:46: S: Who is this guy? Slash, what lies in the shadow of the statue?

8:45: S: Legit, I do not want to watch her actually licking herself.

8:44: H: This Hardee’s commercial makes me physically ill. Beautiful lady walking through a farmer’s market who proceeds to pig out disgustingly on an oozing burger. Makes me hungry, of course.

8:39: S: Building the Hatch. (Sidenote: Hannah is saying these numbers out loud).

8:38: S: Baby Miles and adult Miles are in the same location!?!

8:36: H: This is Roger: “I hate you, Jack. Go away. Now let me confide in you about my conspiracy theories.”

8:34: S: I think Captain and Tennille’s relationship are symbolic of Hurley and Miles’.

8:29: S: Haha, douche. Fun fact, Hannah only recently told me how to spell that word correctly. Deutsch does not equal Douche. Unless it was circa 1943. Or David Hasselhoff.

8:28: H: 1. They can say douche on TV??? 2. Dr. Chang is Miles’ dad! Good job, Steph.

8:27: S: Dr. Chang, more like Dr. Asshole.

8:26: H: Sometimes I get the feeling that Hurley is not crazy, he’s just kind of stupid.

8:25: S: Han, that is why we are biffs. Also, Captain and Tennille! At least they went back to solid music.

8:24: H: Kate, stop flirting with Ben’s dad. It’s creepy. And you’re a whore. And once again, why do you want to save Ben’s life? I will never understand.

8:23: S: 1. Miles, I could totally pull the ‘your-dead-son-loved-you-now-give-me-three-grand’. 2. Oh, hey Naomi.

8:21: S: There is no way Hurley can talk to dead people…that’s just some latent crazy.

8:20: H: Death by filling? Sux. Not a glamorous way to go.

8:19: S: Oh Hurley, that is not flatulence, that is a corpse.

8:14: S: Real convincing, Juliet.

8:13: S: My technical related difficulties are over! Slash, Dr. Chang? Miles dad? Or me being racist?

8:12: H: Okay, not so anti-climactic anymore. Miles’ dad’s body is totally on the Island!

8:12: H: The music right now does not fit this very anti-climactic moment.

8:10: H: Miles is sooo punk rock right now. Skunk hair is always in style.

8:03: H: Way to use a nondescript Asian child to represent Miles, Lost people.

Tags:,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | No Comments »

Lost: Live Blog

Wednesday, April 8th, 2009 | Student Life Staff

9:02 S: That would be the most atrocious ending of a television show ever. Also, Miles? He’s the missing piece? Hmm…Joan of Arcadia is an undercover prostitute right now on ABC’s “The Unusuals.”

9:00 H: At least Ben didn’t get off that easy. Also, I can’t shake the suspicion that this entire show takes plac in Locke’s head as he sits in his wheelchair unable to go on the walkabout.

8:58 S: The smoke monster would make the worst host of “This Is Your Life.”

8:57 S: “They’re treasure was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure.” Shut your eyes Ben! If you can’t see it, it can’t turn you into a skeleton.

8:56 S: Eagerly anticipating the typical last wtf two minutes of LOST.

8:55 S: Ben, way to not love your stolen daughter. Also, I’m pretty sure Indiana Jones has been in that temple.

8:54 H: I don’t think this bitch knows what lies in the shadow of the statue. Could they have the sickness that Danielle’s people had? Or was that just imagined by her already-psychotic mind?

8:53 S: New Annalucia, what the eff are you talking about.

8:52 S: Oh, you. Because Desmond is The Constant. Speaking of constants, where in God’s name as Faraday gone?

8:50 H: Desmond and Penny are the one thing that HAS to remain constant.

8:48 S: And now we know why Ben showed up at the dock wrecked.

8:47 S: BEN. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU.

8:47 H: If Ben killed Penny, I will…..I will do the equivalent of murdering a fictional character. Not sure what that is yet.

8:45 S: This is where Ben was taken and ‘never the same again’. The Temple.

8:44 S: Ben, get over the fact that you can’t speak to ‘Jacob.’ Oh, how the tables have turned.

8:44 H: Also, what does dying feel like. How did you break out of the coffin? So many questions.

8:43 H: Oh, so you’re the same man you’ve always been, Locke? And who might that be?

8:41 S: Because Locke totally is. Ben is that kid in high school that forces himself into your group of friends and everyone just says okay because they are secretly afraid of him.

8:40 H: I love when Locke one-ups Ben and makes him ponder whether Locke is the true prophet of the island.

8:40 S: Also, totally called Ben shooting Caesar.

8:38 S: Ben is off his game tonight. Also, Sayid shot him in the past, but here he is playing mental Stratego with Ben.

8:37 H: Hearing Ben say he’s scared doesn’t give me the satisfaction I thought it would.

8:36 S: Ben totally wanted to sic that smoke monster on Locke.

8:35 S: Alex is dead. Ben is fighting the inevitable. What is this island??

8:34 S: So we never saw this hostile takeover of the Dharma initiative. And here’s the Charles I know and fear.

8:33 H: I find it hard to believe that Ben, who literally controls the black smoke monster, would have no name for it. Really? Seriously, really?

8:32 S: Ben has no idea what is happening. This is great.

8:31 S: Where is Hurley to explain everything about time travel and Marty McFly to me?!

8:28 S: If there is a God, and he doesn’t sound like Morgan Freeman. I’m going to be pretty disappointed.

8:26 S: Sun and Lepidus had a nice game of RISK going. Symbolic of something? Probably not.

8:25 H: Locke’s tone suggests that he is orchestrating this whole thing. What a Ben move!

8:23 H: As he ages, Widmore gets more and more Australian. Also, he looks a lot better without hair.

8:21 H: I like that they can joke about Ben’s attempted murder of Locke. Not too soon, apparently.

8:17 H: I’ll never get over the swelling music. The show wouldn’t be half as suspenseful without it.

8:16 S: Ben, I hate slash admire you.

8:15 H: Locke’s calling his bluff.

8:14 S: God, you can never tell with Ben. He’s lying. He’s totally lying. And it obv didn’t work if you guys are separated by thirty effing years.

8:13 S: Ben is a quick one.

8:11 H: Reminiscent of when they tried to steal Aaron. So that’s where Ethan learned is baby-snatching abilities.

8:10 H: I am literally laughing out loud at this cub scout hairdo and ascot. And ETHAN.

8:10 S: Ben, or Brutus?

8:08  S: Ben is such a tricky beast.

8:04. Steph: Finally, a smoke-monster centric episode.

8:03: Hannah: He doesn’t sound Australian!

Oh hey everyone.

Hannah, TV editor, and I, Cadenza editor, are trying out this whole live blog business while we watch LOST. So prepare to get your world rocked by how little we know about this show after watching it for a good 4 years now.

Tags:,
Posted in Funcooker, Take on TV | No Comments »

Newer Entries »