Bernell DorroughIt’s double the flavor and double the fun when Lindsy Williamson and Anthony Hollins get together and wax intellectual with Student Life.
Student Life: Lindsy – your first name has no ‘E’ in it. But your middle name has an ‘E’, so it’s not like your parents had something against the ‘E.’ What’s up with that?
Lindsy Williamson: No way! Get out of town! I never knew. I think my parents just thought it would be unique or something.
SL: Bigger side: LeBron’s upside or J-Lo’s backside?
Anthony Hollins: I’d say J-Lo’s backside.
LW: I’m gonna go with J-Lo too.
SL: Last year, LeBron’s teammate Ricky Davis attempted to shoot on his own basket so he could get a rebound and get credit for a triple-double. Is Ricky Davis the man or what?
LW: You gotta do what you gotta do.
SL: Would you shoot at your own basket if it meant getting a triple-double?
AH: No. If you’re not good enough to get it in the regular game, then it’s not worth it.
SL: With Kobe and Shaq engaging in another war of words recently, some conspiracy theorists believe that the entire thing was orchestrated by Lakers’ coach Phil Jackson to divert attention away from Kobe’s legal troubles. If this is the case, don’t you think a simple, “Yo, Shaq. Yo mama!” would have been enough?
AH: No, that would have hit a nerve if he went at his mom. Talking about his fat and his body is ok, but saying something about his mom might start a real fight.
SL: President Bush recently arrived in London as part of a larger trip to England. Would it be too much to ask for him to stay there?
AH: Not a bad idea, actually. Maybe we can pull Arnold from California to run the country.
LW: Keep George and send the Dixie Chicks to England.
SL: Lindsy, how did your team respond last year when critics said you wouldn’t be as strong?
LW: We were at Wheaton last year. We were warming up and one of most intense players ever overheard someone from Wheaton saying, “I heard they lost all these good players. They’re not supposed to so good this year.” So she said, “well, we’re pretty damn good,” right in the middle of a warm-up.
SL: Who is your most difficult opponent?
AH: Definitely my dad. He used to play in the NBA, so even as he got older, he was still really good. We used to go at it all the time. It would get pretty heated with lots of trash-talking.
LW: Definitely ourselves. Our practices are really tough, but I’ll tell you one opponent who is not so tough: Anthony Hollins. His broken thumb is no excuse. It wouldn’t slow me down.
SL: I hear both teams enjoy singing.
LW: The sophomores have Celine Dion sing-a-longs. She’s a favorite in the locker room. I personally wish she would have drowned with the Titanic.
AH: Freshman year, we went karaoke bowling and the seniors picked out songs for us. I had to sign Shania Twain’s “Man, I feel like a Woman.” The funny part is, I knew all the lyrics.
SL: Trash talk is an integral part of basketball. Do you ever talk junk as radical as “my cross-over is only rivaled by that of country music and pop sensation Shania Twain!”
AH: Not only do I say that line, but I proceed to sing both her top country and pop hits.
SL: Lil’ Troy raps, “wanna be a baller, shot caller, 20-inch blades on the Impala” in his famous song, “Baller.” With the possible exception of the 20-inch blades, which to me, seems a little excessive, have you ever felt yourself wishing the same thing?
LW: I don’t wish for things like Lil’ Troy. You either have it or you don’t. To quote another rapper, Juvenile, “she get it from her mama.”
SL: Space Jam: I didn’t find that movie terribly realistic. It just didn’t make sense that the little aliens would want Shawn Bradley’s talent. Is being 7’6″ really a talent?
AH: I agree with you. It’s not a talent, but as they say, “you can’t teach size.”
SL: Anthony, I hear you guys like to play hide-and-seek.
AH: My freshman year over Christmas Break, it gets a little boring, so after practice we play hide-and-seek in the A.C. We have one guy hide and everyone finds him after ten minutes. After about the third time, we picked an unsuspecting freshman, Mike Faherty, and we had him hide and left him in there.
SL: Scientists in Japan believe they have discovered a new species of whale about the size of a motor home, an impressive discovery considering how unusual it is to find new species of animals that are that large. Couldn’t they have just asked Aquaman?
AH: That would have been too easy. Scientists like a challenge.
LW: They would have, but unfortunately, he doesn’t speak Japanese.