Matthew Goldberg
Sports Editor
Outlook:
The Chargers epitomize California: screwed up and out of control. While California voters seem determined to recall Gray Davis, the Chargers are stuck with David Boston. After spending 250,000 dollars getting buff, Boston got himself suspended for failing to follow team policies. Sounds like California and the Chargers are headed in the same direction – and it is not up.
Game of the Week: San Diego at Jacksonville
These two sunbelt cities are great places for Super Bowls, but not for NFL teams. The only upside of this game is that someone has to win.
Pankaj Chhabra
Sports Editor
Outlook:
This weekend features great coaching storylines as Holmgren, Mariuchi, and Dungy return to their former homes. Also, Brett Favre makes his return to the big screen in “There’s Still Something About Mary: Attack of the Hair Gel.”
Game of the Week: Denver at Kansas City
According to SI.com, Tony Gonzalez glued a dog’s headshot to an attractive woman’s picture, claiming it was “a picture of the girl [an unidentified teammate] hooked up with the first night we went out during training camp.” Upon learning the news, head coach Dick Vermeil wept.
Joe Ciolli
Sports Editor
Outlook:
The 49ers’ team chemistry is in serious jeopardy. Jeff Garcia hates Owens because he is really good and cocky. Owens hates Garcia because he’s a bald hick. If the 49ers don’t beat the Lions, the team will implode. When it comes down to it, they have more money than I ever will.
Game of the Week: Denver at Kansas City
The Chiefs’ Dante Hall has evolved into football’s most dangerous return man, running in six kickoffs/punts in nine games. He’s no Forrest Gump, but the combination of Hall and Priest Holmes makes the Chiefs virtually unbeatable.
Ashley Malnove
Sports Designer
Outlook:
So it appears that Chicago did not quite win last week. Sorry Pankaj. Maybe I’m not doing all that well in NFL picks, but evidently Rush Limbaugh isn’t qualified for NFL Sunday Countdown. By Limbaugh’s standards, I’m surprised he lasted until this week. Evidently politics and sports writers make strange bedfellows.
Game of the Week: Washington at Philadelphia
I’m going with McNabb’s Eagles. Someone needs to stick up for him because instead of taking on Limbaugh, the other talking heads were too busy twiddling their thumbs.
Renee Hires
Staff Reporter
Outlook:
I gotta tell ya, ever since the darn mailman randomly stopped delivering our ESPN and SI magazines, I’ve been cut off from the football world. Someone please fill me in on what goes down this weekend, or better yet, buy me new subscriptions.
Game of the Week: Oakland at Chicago
The Raiders have to win. I mean, I think our Bears could beat these Bears. Question is, which will be uglier: Chicago’s loss or their new UFO-esque atrocity of a stadium? Even I could design something better than that, right Jozewicz?