Brian StittRating: 1.5/5
Sounds Like:
Air: Acoustic 10 Years singing Chris Carrabba lyrics
Earth: If Matchbox Twenty sang blues
Tracks to Download:
“Moving Mountains,” “Deadalus”
Philip Glass was a minimalist; Thrice just never does anything with “The Alchemy Index Vol. III & IV.” All 12 tracks are very different, spanning new age to spirituals, but that only lends to the feeling that the album is an exercise in mediocrity. The band is truly inventive in finding various ways to lose a listener’s attention. One common thread is a complete dearth of stirring moments. If you like melodies reminiscent of Ben Stein in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,” by all means, pick up this new all-acoustic CD. Otherwise, you can’t get away from most of the tracks quickly enough.
This collection is meant to be partnered with last year’s installment to form a concept album exploring the most basic natural elements. Volumes III and IV explore Air and Earth, respectively. Apparently, Air is not a goldmine for musical inspirational, as the band plays as vapidly as, well, air. Luckily, the contributions from the Earth half of the album are a bit meatier, with hints of hints of blues and even occasional drums.
The biggest travesty is that the band does not merely play repetitive figures; guitarist Teppei Teranishi does entire songs on one chord. Don’t believe me? Listen to “A Song for Milly Michaelson.” There are four notes. I counted. I don’t know what poor Milly did to deserve such a tribute, but I feel for her. Of the six Air tracks, only “Daedalus” and “The Sky is Falling” convinced me that I wasn’t listening to a really bad lullaby, though the latter loses points for going out of its way to add whiny saxophone.
On “As the Crow Flies,” Dustin Kensrue keeps up the obnoxious monotone whisper-singing with about as much lyrical precision as a second grader. The song mostly features him singing “Fly over me” ad nauseum. Meanwhile, “Silver Wings” goes in a differently annoying direction, channeling Enya with what sounds like a drum machine and with creepy, new age-y falsetto vocal chanting.
Luckily, the last six tracks (the Earth half of the album) pick up the pace a bit. “Moving Mountains” is a respectable camp-fire ditty, and piano-heavy “Digging My Own Grave” could fit right in at a smoky bar after hours, though I can’t defend the clarinet.
Nevertheless, Earth also falls victim to boring, pointless creepiness. It sounds fantastic following the Air tracks, but even all the bizarre Jesus references can’t salvage this tanker of an album. Thrice spends about an hour and a half musing on fire, water, air and earth, but they never realize an element of style.