I’ll start off by saying that I enjoy watching sports and that I have a basic fondness for three teams: the St. Louis Cardinals, the Carolina Panthers and the University of North Carolina Tar Heels. The first, obviously, is due to the fact that I go to school in St. Louis and never had a home baseball team before 2008 when I came here.

It has been enjoyable to watch you grow together as individuals and as a group. The theme you helped carry throughout the year—FINISH—is apropos to your time here. You have finished a journey that has taken you through research, shadowing doctors from St. Louis to Mexico, working high finance in Chicago, bungee jumping in New Zealand, designing football helmets, beating nationally-ranked teams, taking leadership roles in student government and fraternities, picking up advanced degrees while playing two sports, making a difference through support of the other sports teams on the courts, to climbing Pike’s Peak.

Embarrassed. Regretful. Humiliated. Head coach of the newly recognized varsity Jive team Susie Pirouette searched for enough adjectives to describe her most recent mishap in front of disappointed media members and fans last night.

Washington University has announced that the Jive Dance program will become the University’s 15th varsity athletic team. Many of the existing varsity programs expressed concern about allocation of the existing athletics budget to the dance team. Jive head coach Susie Pirouette hoped to quell any concern about fiscal irresponsibility.

This year’s graduating Washington University football stars are expressing their discomfort with the current labor situation in the National Football League. With the current tension between NFL owners and the former NFL Players Association, some potential draft picks are concerned that they will lose their rookie seasons to the lockout.

The Washington University club squash team will compete for the Collegiate Squash Association Hawthorn Cup in its inaugural season. The cup is awarded to the champion of the “G” division.

Sports are dirty; sometimes they’re rough. You can play them with a team or go solo, and they make you all sweaty and tired but also make you feel good and want to pat other people on the butt. What we’re trying to say is, sports are just like sex. And whenever we’re watching them on TV, the commentators are always saying things that make us giggle because, well, we’re immature.

The Washington University cross country teams competed this past Saturday, Oct. 9, at the Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology Gibson Family Invitational in Terre Haute, Ind. The No. 2 men’s team placed fifth in a field of 13 teams, with its top five finishing in the overall top 50. Freshman Tarek Elhage led the way in the 8-km. race with a time of 27:40.

On Monday, April 5, the St. Louis Cardinals begin the regular season, hosting the Cincinnati Reds at Busch Stadium. After an NL Central division title and a first round exit in last year’s playoffs, the Cardinals are the clear favorites to take the division again. Here are some of the key themes and players who you should be watching out for:

After a hot 5-1 start to the season, the Washington University baseball team was looking at the annual University Athletic Association (UAA) tournament with high hopes. The tournament, which took place over spring break in Florida, was to be a chance for the Bears to truly test their skills. Instead, the team dropped four straight games, coming away with a 1-4 conference record.