Wise words from a wise group of girls. See, the Spice Girls really knew what they were talking about a decade ago when they incorporated this advice into their debut single. While these words may have multiple connotations, what the Girls were really trying to emphasize is the importance of friendship and how friendship must always come first. After all, without good friends by your side, the world can be a cruel, lonely place, even with the solace and comfort of a romantic relationship.

Let’s say you and your best friend both like the same guy or girl; this is a typical situation but certainly not an easy one. Even way back when I was in first grade, I remember my best friend Tony and I had a crush on the same girl, Lyndsey. To Tony and me, Lyndsey was the perfect seven-year-old: She was attractive, she could ride a bike perfectly and she had the best playground in her backyard. Clearly, Tony and I were in love. Still, in the back of our immature, under-developed minds, we knew we couldn’t like the same girl. Tensions quickly mounted. After hearing from another friend that Tony had given Lyndsey a little toy pony from a cereal box, I was furious, and I knew that I had to redeem myself. So, I decided to give Lyndsey a Ring Pop—you know, those old-school, candy lollipop rings that were amazing. She loved it, and I was happy. Tony, on the other hand, was less than thrilled. In the end, Lyndsey chose Nick, another guy our age who we all thought was really cool because he listened to rap music. Consequently, Tony and I had to stop liking Lyndsey and move on to crush on a new girl, and our friendship continued.

This situation, while nowadays slightly more complicated, still arises in college life. If you and your friend like the same person, it is never a good idea to end a friendship over it. Never let an object of affection jeopardize a solid friendship. In this case, you and your friend must communicate, both with each other and with the person you like. If the person you’re both fighting over is not interested in either of you, as was the case with Tony and me, then move on. However, if that special someone does like one of you, you need to consider your friend. Talk with him/her and make sure that it is okay to date that special someone you both like. If your friend is a good friend and your special someone likes you back, then your friend will hopefully understand and move on to find someone else. Likewise, if that guy you like is crushing on your friend, be happy for your friend, and find someone else too.

The same rules apply to hookups. Not only can it jeopardize a friendship, but also two friends hooking up with the same guy is both weird and messy. It really can only lead to negative consequences. There are enough guys and girls on campus and outside of the Wash. U. bubble to find. Go out, have fun, be yourself, and you are bound to find someone interesting for that particular Friday or Saturday night.

Also important is balancing the relationships with both your special someone and your friends. It is always best to have your special someone enjoy the company of your friends and vice versa. And tell your special someone: “if you want to be my lover, then you’re gonna have to get in good with my friends.” Or you can change these words around. Just make sure to emphasize the importance of having a strong bond that unites your friends with your special someone, so that everyone can get along and enjoy each other’s company.