Eternal life made easy: How the Internet never forgets and why we should remember that

Hi, my name is John Schmidt, and with this sentence, I’ve gained immortality. This column is, so to speak, my philosopher’s stone, my Great American Novel, my legacy. Each time a future employer, romantic interest or curious acquaintance Googles my name, somewhere in the search results this’ll be there, and I’ll be reviewed on Yelp! accordingly because of it.