How typical was your Parent and Family weekend?

Rachel Wilson

Parents. You love them. They gave birth to you and fed you and raised you and stuff, and after half a semester of studying, partying, making friends and living in Olin Library, Parent and Family Weekend rolled around so Wash. U. students could see their loved ones again. If your folks were here—especially if they were visiting you for the first time—your Parents’ Weekend experience probably wasn’t all that different from everyone else’s. Take a look at our checklist and keep tally of how many of these classic Parents’ Weekend experiences you had:

1. Your parents took you out to lunch, dinner, breakfast, brunch, etc.

Let’s face it, even though the food at Wash. U. rocks, you were getting sick of the DUC—plus, you’ve got to save those meal points!

2. Of course, you still took your parents to eat somewhere on campus so they could get the “full college experience.”

(Bonus points if you got crepes or went to Ibby’s.)

3. If your parents drove, you needed GPS just to find a decent parking spot, plus platinum-level parking skills.

Shout out to all the Wash. U. students with cars who still managed to park legally when all the spots were taken!

4. You saw the acapella concert/improv show/other family-planned event, and odds are, it was really fun.

5. You were given the “you need to take your studies more seriously” lecture.

6. You had to miss a really cool party/cancel your other weekend plans because PARENTS.

7. Or you just did a really good job hiding your hangover.

(Or a terrible job.)

8. Your parents took you shopping.

Those credit cards were getting a little rusty…

9. You tried to go to the study abroad info session, but it was completely packed and you couldn’t get in.

Oh well, you can just study in St. Louis for all four years. No big deal.

10. You had to explain to your parents what Yik Yak was.

Or you just didn’t. It’s hard and awkward to explain.

11. Your parents met other parents, and had a “my kid is smarter than your kid” battle. And it got ugly.

But deep down, you know you’re the biggest genius.

12. You became a mock tour guide who knew all the ins and outs of campus.

(Even though there are a dozen buildings you’ve never been in, and you couldn’t explain what Sukkah City was.)

13. Your friends met your parents and vice versa, and everyone tried to play it cool.

14. Your dad made really bad jokes, while your mom told really embarrassing stories. Sometimes at the same time!

15. Your parents tried to schedule stuff before 10 a.m. on the weekend, being “morning people,” and you couldn’t even.

16. You saw your crush and tried to play it cool in front of your parents, being all like

When really you’re like

17. Give yourself one lonely point if your parents didn’t come.

But don’t feel sad! Call them if you didn’t this weekend. They love and miss you too.

18. The weekend came to an end, you had to say goodbye to your family, and there was that conflicting want-them-to-leave-but-don’t-want-them-to-leave feeling, but you’ll see them again before you know it.

Now add up those points!

0-6 – You’re either not doing Parents’ Weekend right, or you’re doing it too well to even register on this checklist. Or maybe your parents didn’t even come—sorry!

7-12 – You had a pretty typical Parents’ Weekend experience. Not bad!

13-18 – You and your family got the full Parents’ Weekend experience. Congrats! Hopefully you’re not too sick of them now.