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1. While I understand that you are proud of your daughter’s accomplishments and hard work (as my parents are of mine), I’m sure you can think of times where she’s read a novel for fun or played a cello piece simply because she enjoys it. It is her choice to do what seems best to her and she selects that activity that will give her the most satisfaction. Likewise, these men in question (and the 200 other Seniors) are taking a well-deserved weekend out for themselves. We all work hard here, and this weekend (which consisted of more than the Mother’s trip) was supposed to be a fun and relaxing experience, a break from the daily grind to celebrate the last year of school. Knowing when to work and when to have fun is part of living a balanced and healthy life.

2. Please keep in mind, everyone who went on the trip is graduating this year. This means they put in the work and time to maintain grades at a top 20 school for over three years. All of them care about their studies, all of them have logged hours at the library. One weekend off is not excessive nor depraved.

3. The students offered to go home and change clothes. They were told that they would still be denied entry. When they offered to change and were told they would still not be allowed in, a possible dress code violation crossed into racism and discrimination.

I know one of the six who were denied entry, and he is one of the most hard-working, motivated, and respected students on campus. He volunteers his time, is an excellent friend, a leader in many student groups, and is a kind and respectful person. Granted, I know this because I have met him, a privilege many who read this article have not had. The student body is fighting back against an injustice and I believe that should be admired, not ridiculed not scoffed at.

Thank you for your time,

Student X

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2. Have a care with hyperbole. To compare this situation to a murderer going free is laughable. As I told Son, being barred from the front of a bus is a JOKE indignity.

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1. If those jeans aren’t baggy, then we disagree. They’re easily the equivalent of two pair of 501s. As Seneca said: “We live not according to reason, but according to fashion.”

2. “Seniors at one of the top schools around the country” do NOT need to “have a good time and de-stress.” Seniors at Arizona State can do that. What’s your major? What’s your GPA? Son, you really ought to care more about your studies, especially if I’m paying for them. It is unfortunate that nobody sees the benevolent hand of Providence in this episode, ushering these students away from a bar and back to their rightful purpose.

3. Black does not equal gangbanger. Agreed.

4. Why is it irrelevant that the Chancellor has eagerly and groundlessly published a legal conclusion about this incident before all the facts are in? It’s an embarrassment on the order of Obama’s gaffe jumping to the unwarranted defense of the Harvard scholar. The Chancellor should be criticized for it.

5. We are, each of us, subjected to indignities large and small at the hands of our fellow man day in and day out. But being denied entrance to a bar on a given night is a JOKE indignity. Go back tomorrow, and when they let you in, you’ll see how happy you should have been being turned away. See also No. 2 above.

“We dont [sic] want your love. Sorry. We do want the ability to drink where you drink, eat where you eat, and party where you party. Thats [sic] all.

That is one sad, sad testament, Son. A father’s love is what you MOST need – with that, all the rest would be water off your back. For the record, if you want to drink and party where I do, problem solved – I don’t do either.

Now get back to your studies.

Love, Dad

* * * * *

Dear Freshman,

“There are literally thousands of ways to detail your feelings about this article, yet you chose to immaturely make false accusations and sarcasm while utilizing the cover of “tough love” to warrant your responses.”

False accusations? Like what? Methinks you’ve just made a false accusation that I made false accusations. Sarcasm? Maybe. Are we all now so sensitive that sarcasm has become too harsh a rhetorical tool?

“I am actually ashamed to go to a school with an individual whose father can be so disrespect [sic]–and dearly hope that I never have to meet your son or daughter during my career here.”

Freshman, you are right to be ashamed, but for the wrong reason. Your statement is as shocking as it is reprehensible. That you conceived of it, much less expressed it in writing, and, apparently, considered it legitimate argument, is indeed shameful and should be a profound embarrassment to you.

1. I need not have been present to know that (1) there are two sides to the story, (2) we haven’t heard the full story yet, and (3) to state as fact in formal correspondence to the mayor of Chicago a legal conclusion that these students were discriminated against because of race without having been there or heard all the evidence, is premature, irresponsible and should be roundly condemned. I don’t remember giving my opinion whether this is a case of racial discrimination. Hypocrisy has nothing to do with it – look it up.

2. Have a care with hyperbole. To compare this situation to a murderer going free is laughable. As I told Son, being barred from a bar is a JOKE indignity.

3. All this chatter about relaxing and de-stressing is as tiresome as it is ironic. If there had been a seventh young man who had spent the weekend at the library, it’s virtually assured that his weekend would have been much more satisfying and far less stressful than this hectic Chicago slash-and-dash.

4. …you will end up looking ridiculously naiive [sic]… (Freshman, why is so much of your energy directed toward calling me names?) Suppose for the sake of argument that the suit is brought, the students win, Mother’s abandons its dress code, gangbangers routinely gain entry, and next year a Wash U student comes home in a wooden box because she got in the way of a knife fight. That seems like a much worse result than a JOKE indignity. Which would you prefer? On which side would you rather err? Who is naïve?

5. “…I reiterate, I really do not ever want to meet one of your children.” Again with this. If you don’t recognize it for the indefensible, blind and baseless discrimination it constitutes, and apologize, then there’s no hope for mankind.

For the record, imagine a kid who has been playing a sport since 6th grade, and has put in the time, done the work and made the sacrifices that playing a sport entails. Who’s quiet, who blossomed late, who nobody knew, who got no press. But who led her team with skill and composure to a high school State Championship, against all odds. (And has won a National Championship at Wash U since then.) About whom coaches, players and parents, on both sides, said repeatedly, “What a beautiful smile,” “Why is she always smiling?”, “Oh, yours has the big smile.” Who doesn’t glare, doesn’t taunt, doesn’t strut, doesn’t “celebrate.” Just plays. And smiles. Who’s never gotten a B, ever, since preschool. OK, a B+. Once. Valedictorian of her high school class, a National Merit Scholar, scored 35 out of 36 on the ACT (that’s the top .01%)… Who does what she says she’ll do, goes where she says she’s going, and got home on time or called to renegotiate. Who doesn’t drink or “party” and doesn’t have friends who do; who tutors them in calculus and physics instead. Who turned in after 2 am time and time again in high school in order to get it all done, but never skipped class. Thought about it once or twice. Didn’t happen. Who’s never cursed, never said “I hate you,” never slammed a door in anger; not in her parents’ presence anyway. Who played the cello in a college orchestra her sophomore year in high school. Who led her high school team to victory in the Regional FIRST Robotics Competition. As captain and driver. Against 37 teams from 8 different states. Mostly boys. Who’s a fearsome and fearless competitor. And a cool cucumber. Who embodies intellect, determination, heart, leadership and passion. And who’s always smiling. That’s who you’ll miss meeting. Pity, that.

Sincerely,
Dad

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But Regis Murayi I’m with you! I believe this was raciest and I’m glad something is being done!

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I am really tired of your “holier than thou” pretentious attitude.

Perhaps you should take your own advice and approach the matter with an open mind, just as you have asked everyone else to do and truly consider and LISTEN to the side of the story opposing your own. Have you ever put yourself in the shoes of someone who is not a white female and taken the time to consider their point of view? That is all I ask that you do.

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I think he makes extremely valid points, and I am trilled that a third party, someone who doesn’t go to Wash U and someone who has an outsider’s opinion is willing to comment on this issue. Fresh perspective is what we need, and he was willing to get it. Of course, the moment his perspective is brought to light the disrespect comes out in spades.

It is a shame that we live in a society where we don’t feel the need to respect what our elders have to say. Yes, we are adults. But we are YOUNG adults, and we don’t know everything. We can stand to learn something from people- we come to class every day because we want to learn. Why can’t we also learn life lessons?

“Dad”‘s opinions are just as valid as yours. Just because you don’t like them or agree with them doesn’t mean you can be so openly disrespectful. You wouldn’t address a professor like that, no matter how much you didn’t like them or the way they taught you something.

“Dad” has just as much a right to respond to the events here (as this is the US and we do have freedom of speech- oops- I forgot, unless you don’t like when they’re saying, apparently), as the mother of a student who talked about how horrendous this incident was. You say that he wasn’t there- neither was she, and yet she gets props for defending your cause, he gets attacked.

Yes, we are all adults. So let’s please start acting like it. Adults, particularly those of us who attend such a university as Wash U, demonstrate tact, intelligence, a willingness to an open mind and different perspectives, and the desire to ask questions and gather information. So yes, please, let us act like adults. I think it is time for that.

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Has my thoughts on this issue, which are far too long to put in a comment…

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I am actually ashamed to go to a school with an individual whose father can be so disrespect–and dearly hope that I never have to meet your son or daughter during my career here.

Now to address your comment.

1. It’s good to know that YOU are omnipotent and can form your stone-cold, biased and inflammatory conclusion without having been there. You hypocritically call out Chancellor Wrighton on his comment despite his not being present, yet you weren’t present either. If one’s presence at a situation like this is a qualification for having an opinion, then you do not deserve to respond either.

2. You obviously have never experienced anything close to discrimination… or you are just overly ignorant about the world. Eventually, yes, all of us will get over it and move on, but after those who are responsible are punished. What you are advocating is comparable to a judge in a courtroom telling the family of a murder victim to get over it, without punishing the killer. To prevent a similar situation from happening, students must take action.

3. There is literally no purpose in responding to this comment, as it is nothing more than an unwarranted attack on the students. These students are attending one of the best universities in the country — and are extremely qualified (why don’t you try reading about some of those qualifications before ignorantly and angrily responding). They have done their work for four long years and this trip was nothing more than one weekend of relaxing.

4. You indeed could conceal weapons in the outfit that the students were wearing…. except when the same outfit was put on another student (a white student), he was allowed in the club. Your argument could be something close to plausible if you ignore the fact that another student of a different skin color was let into the club. How about you straighten your facts and find out what actually happened before you express your opinions on something, or you will end up looking ridiculously naiive, as you do in this situation.

5. “Tough love.” Please. If this is your version of love, then I reiterate, I really do not ever want to meet one of your children. Also, this isn’t a matter of you As I said before, people will be forced to move on – but only after ensuring that something like this will never happen again.

“It truly disgusted me just now to read what you wrote, and made me ashamed that you went to such a prestigious university as Washington University” – Voice of Reason

Furthermore, how dare you attack anyone at Wash U in this manner. This is a completely childish, immature, and pathetic way to persuade people. You make comments like this, yet demand respect? Are YOU kidding me?

“…you are openly showing extreme disrespect for someone who knows a lot more than you do, who has been through more life experiences than you have, and might be able to teach you a thing or two.”

Finally, I do not know what decade you were born in, but nowadays, age doesn’t simply buy respect. If you want respect, you need to earn it–and stating your “disgust” for one of your children’s classmates is not a good way to start.

I hope you can at least attempt to respond to my comment with something that resembles maturity and civility.

Sincerely,
Freshman

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