On drunken ambiguity
Aviya Lanis | Student Life
I stayed up far too late a few nights ago, talking with my friends, venting some frustrations and laughing about Napoleon (ambiguous jokes are always the best kind). There I sat, crunched against the wall, knees pulled into my chest, when a group of loud and obviously drunk freshmen stumbled past my withdrawn feet, shouting about finding a friend of theirs.
They ran off with quite a bit of noise and left my friends and me to think about what we had seen. The others returned to bantering about the Corsican, but I still couldn’t shed the image of those people stumbling down the hallway.
I don’t understand it.
In my mind, the concept of getting drunk has always evaded even a hint of logic.
Think about it. You pay a ridiculous amount of money for every drink, chugging can after can or bottle after bottle, knowing full well that the next morning you could (and most likely will) wake with a pounding headache and maybe even a bed buddy who looks a lot like Quasimodo. On top of that, everyone knows that enough partying can lead to a Freshman (or Sophomore or Junior or Senior) 15 and, later on in life, that wonderful condition that doctors call cirrhosis of the liver. Am I using a slippery slope argument? Maybe, but everyone knows that drunk people have slower reflexes and impaired balance, so the argument still stands.
I write this not, though, as a nutritionist or MADD lobbyist or even as someone who is tired of people stomping on the floor above him every morning at 3 o’clock. I write this because I am genuinely curious as to what drives someone to drink until they don’t know where they are.
When does life become so bad that the only possible escape is from a cup you scored from some Greek letters or your roommate? Why is it that almost every non-CS40 event we have on this campus is so awkward that we have to lubricate our social gears with a disgusting-smelling drink that looks like pee? What triggers us to drink and drink until we find humor in the vomit dripping down our shirt and saturating those shoes that we hoped so badly would match our outfit for the party? I asked myself those questions that night as I took a walk through the rain.
It still doesn’t make sense to me. We all attend this amazing school with these amazing people and opportunities, yet we feel so compelled to get wasted every weekend. Is there solace in it? Because all I have seen is someone in tears, retching up their dinner. Is there happiness in it? Because all I have seen is someone staggering around with a dejected look on their face. Is there pride in it? Because all I have seen is someone babbling incoherently about how drunk they were.
That same night as I had just come in from my walk, a girl bolted down the stairs behind me, looking around frantically with confusion in her eyes. She finally looked at me and said with an urgency in her voice, “How do I get out of here? I can’t find my way out of here.” I showed her that the door was merely a few feet behind her, and before I even had a chance to ask her if she was all right, she was gone.
That really resonated with me because it made me wonder if that was the reason: Maybe we just want to get out of here. Maybe we’re all so miserable, and we think there’s no escape until someone points to that easy-access door right behind us, and then we have it, our answer. Or, at least we think it’s our answer, but what does it tell us, really? I’m still trying to figure that one out.
I probably will not make any friends with this column, but I think someone needed to say it. As much as that girl was trying to find her way out of the building, we are all trying to find our way to someplace a little better. I have seen people try to find their way through a drunken stupor, but it never quite works out. No, I’ve found in my experience that the best way is maybe just sitting up until 2:30 in the morning with a group of people that understands your ambiguous jokes and listens to every qualm you have, however small it may be.
Gabe,
I understand your point of view. I never drank in high school for personal reasons and found drinkers to be shallow. Then I came to realize that I was being downright judgmental…shallow, if you will.
Drinking really is not that bad, buddy. Some people drink too much, others drink to escape their problems, to get away from stress, and although you may not believe it, some people drink just because it’s fun.
I drink moderately now because I think it’s a lot of fun. Alcohol may technically be a depressant, but I challenge you to find me drunk at a party with a dejected look on my face, downtrodden and confused due to the toxins flowing through my veins.
I’ll grant you this, alcohol can obviously be very dangerous and it’s effects should not be taken lightly. If you had stuck to this point, it might not have sounded like you were attacking every drinker on campus.
Final point: Generalizations are immature and shallow…you’ll learn.
JC, you’re an idiot. The majority of kids who drink don’t NEED a stimulant to make them happy, but drinking is fun and makes them (us) happy. Your generalizations are amazing to me…thinking drinkers have “shallow” personalities. My guess, and though I would like to avoid any ad hominem argument here, is that there is a bit of jealousy in that fun-lacking heart of yours. I myself did not drink in high school, and am good friends with some non-drinkers here… and you know what? They don’t judge me and I don’t judge them. I don’t think they’re pussies, or lame, or losers…its just their life choice, and they don’t think I’m shallow, idioitic, or throwing my life away. In addition, don’t get me started on your “college is for intelLigent people” bullcrap…if you are going to indirectly claim that drinkers or unintelligent, at least spell the word correctly (how ironic). As far as money, I don’t look at getting drunk off my cash as a waste of money, much as how I don’t see going to a concert or sports event to be a waste of money. I am paying for something I enjoy (and in terms of alcohol, I love a good beer), and thus it is not a waste. Frankly, JC, life is too short to view it from that lens you seem to possess. Some of my greatest memories in college (and life) have been drunk memories (yes! People are actually able to remember things after three beers!). Fantastic stories, crazy stories, great people, etc are all aspects of drinking in college, and when I look back on my life and remember those crazy nights (even when I puked, got hurt, or blacked out) I had with my friends, I won’t regret it…it sure beats sitting by myself in my room envious of those around me. Forgive me if I’m brash, but this is the kind of comment that your comment requires as a response.
Final point: Freshmen are drunken idiots, its a way of life…they’ll learn.
Kudos to gabe for having the balls to write this article. You make good points and are obviously a strong-willed person. A bit focused on the excess aspect of drinking, but it is definitely a relevant article to college life.
This is probably the best article I have read in StudLife since my freshman year and I had an article written about me. I had these thoughts during my time in undergrad (and still do in med school, because some people still cannot handle their alcohol when they are out of college) but was unable to articulate them this well. VERY well done.
Why do you need to have a stimulant to make you happy? Is your personality so shallow that you need something to make you compatable with other people. College is for inteligent people so why do you want to destroy brain cells by drinking, why do you want to spend your hard earned money and then just throw it up? Life is too short to throw it away by doing things that make you forget where you were the day before or where you are right now. Make your college experiences memorable, ones you would want to pass on to your children and ones that you would want your children to experience also. You have but one life, enjoy it and remember it.
as previous readers have pointed out…i believe it’s alcohol’s unrivaled ability to bring a social group together that will always make it popular. taking shots together, pitching in for beer together, or even going to a bar together. it’s no secret that alcohol releases brain chemicals that make you feel good, and bonding/interacting with other people does the same thing. so put them together…and you are feeling pretty great. until later when you get the negative effects of alcohol. BUT when it gets late and people start splitting off, it’s even fun to share those stories the next day. we are social beings, and for a lot of people alcohol is a easiest way to get the social interaction and mental freedom that we naturally desire.
Great job, Gabe. Finally someone with the guts to speak up!
Rachel Wisdom: You are hilarious! i get your sarcasm and it is super witty!
I think I should buy you a drink. While I appreciate your point of view, you use exaggerated stereotypes for all of the ‘drunks’ on campus. In college, people are often learning for the first time how to handle themselves around alcohol so you would expect some debauchery. Drinking alcohol is not illogical, drinking to excess is. We are all adults here and thankfully are provided an environment where we can figure out for ourselves how to handle our alcohol.
People commenting that there is nothing good to come from drinking alcohol have to be kidding themselves. It’s just another activity that can bring people together and help to form relationships. Get a grip.
So glad to see there’s someone else on campus with a brain -great article!
“I probably will not make any friends with this column, but I think someone needed to say it.”
Gabe, you are 100% right with the second half of that statement. And, for the record, you are quite incorrect about the first half.
There should really be, as you mention, some non-alcohol based social programming on campus. As a senior, my possibilities in making a difference are waning, but it’s not too late.
Non-drinkers, self-proclaimed “losers” and hence those who adopt logic…fight for your right to be heard on campus!
Getting drunk is awesome, being drunk is awesome, hanging out with other people who are drunk is awesome – hell, sometimes even a hangover can be awesome.
Very few people *want* to drink themselves into total oblivion, but there’s a fine line between having a great buzz and blacking out / vomiting. Some of my favorite memories of college so far are drinking with my friends in various contexts – not just being crunk at dance parties, but also just sitting around, nursing a few cocktails and chatting. There is a multitude of experience within the category of “drunk” – some of it sucks indeed, but much of it is a blast.
Also, contrary to your (presumably limited) experience, not all alcohol looks, tastes, and smells like urine. Although most light beer does.
wow what an awesome cartoon…well done Aviya!!
Gabe,
I applaud you for writing this, and I believe that if you read Sig Eper’s comment you’ll understand the reason for all the binge drinking that goes on:
“because getting drunk is awesome”
Now there are exceptions, such as connoisseurs who may simply enjoy the taste, but for the most part drinking (especially among young people) is a purely social phenomenon. Somebody sees that everybody else is doing it, and they feel like they must follow suit or they will not seem “cool”. Once many of these binge drinkers finally come to realize they’ll have to change their ways if they hope to survive and excel in the “real world” (i.e. outside of WashU), many of them will become at least-semi responsible adults. Of course, there are those that will not, and hence you have the middle-aged alcoholics who sadly are quite prevalent in society today.
As I’m sure you’ve guessed by now, I am a teetotaler myself. When I was a freshman, I decided to give alcohol a try, yet after one semester and a few parties (at which I never had more than two drinks), I came to see that there was nothing good that could come out of it all. There are so many reasons not to drink (it’s bad for your health, it wastes your money, it tastes awful for the most part), and if the only plus on the other side of the scale is that it will win you more “friends”, then personally I’d rather have no friends (though there are plenty of people of real substance (no pun intended) who do not binge out at every opportunity).
Again, bravo on this article, and hopefully it will show people out there who question the allure of “getting wasted” and making a complete fool of oneself that they are not alone.
Great article. I guessed by the name of it that it was written by my son. I was wrong, but I thoroughly enjoyed it anyway. You’ve made a friend here.
because getting drunk is awesome
Gabe –
Good job, and you’re not alone. As a senior who does drink (never beer and never until I am drunk, however!), I often wonder the same thing.