“The Room”

Widely hailed as one of the worst films of all time, “The Room” is coming back to the Tivoli on Friday and Saturday night at midnight. Written by, directed by and starring Tommy Wiseau, the movie has garnered a large cult following with some serious traditions that make watching this movie a magical experience.

What to Expect
No exaggeration, “The Room” is actually one of the worst movies of all time. It’s hard to pick out just which aspects are so horrible because, well, they’re all pretty awful. The writing is awkward and forced, and there are holes in the plot. Characters appear on screen without being introduced (ever), people disappear and characters are replaced midway through. The acting, especially Wiseau’s, isn’t fit for community theater. Tommy can’t even make it through a scene without sending the entire (usually intoxicated) audience into roaring laughter. Even the roles not held by Wiseau failed to add anything substantial to the process. The shots aren’t focused, the editing is choppy and erratic and the music is cheesy. But don’t think too hard about it, just enjoy.

What to Bring and Do
Spoons
Make sure you bring a healthy supply of spoons when you go see “The Room.” Almost all of the artwork in the film features spoons in some way. When you see one of these paintings, throw a handful of spoons at the screen and yell, “Spoon!” If you don’t want to bring too many, sit near the front and just use the ones that hit the back of your head.

“Cancer!”
At some point in the movie, Lisa’s mother says that she has cancer, yet never again does she mention it. Just to remind her that she does in fact have cancer, yell it at the screen whenever she appears. Maybe she’ll remember.

“Cause you’re a woman!”
Among its many faults, “The Room” is heavily misogynistic. Make sure to point this out at any opportunity by yelling “Cause you’re a woman,” after anything mildly negative that a female character does on screen.

“Go! Go! Go!”
For some reason, Wiseau likes to remind you that “The Room” takes place in San Francisco by panning across the Golden Gate Bridge. Sometimes he makes it all the way across, sometimes he doesn’t. But it’s up to you to cheer him on.

“USA! USA! USA!”
During the movie’s climax—which I don’t want to spoil—you may notice a patriotic color scheme. This is when the USA chants begin.

There are tons of other lines you’ll want to shout at the screen, especially, “How did this movie get made?”—but don’t worry, you’ll catch on quickly.