News Schnews
Belegarth and ROTC battle in the swamp; students shell-shocked
In an unprecedented campus occurrence, Belegarth, the medieval combat society that can be seen many Sunday afternoons playing with foam swords, and ROTC came to blows in an all-out battle on the swamp.
Abu Ghraib-like torture cell discovered deep inside WUPD headquarters
Sophomore Joe Francis’s imprisonment has revealed a dark side of the Washington University Police Department – an underbelly of crime, corruption and secrecy.
SU execs make strange bedfellows…literally
Sexile turned to exile as Student Union President David Ader expelled Treasurer Ed Banti from Tuesday’s Senate meeting following a spat between the two over disputed beau and Vice President Pam Bookbinder.
SHCS discovers new disease
“She was definitely really sick,” said McCarthy. “So of course I figured she had to have mono or strep, because what else could make a person sick like that? And when I saw that the nurse also thought she had mono or strep, I knew I had to be right.”
Dean McLeod expresses an opinion
In a rare moment of weakness, Vice Chancellor for Students Jim McLeod backed away from his usual politically correct dean-speak to express his actual opinion on something last Tuesday.
Student sleeps with her prof, fails class anyway
When freshman Lindsay Slutszky saw the D at the top of her Physics 112 exam, she reacted like many Washington University students do.
Two out of three ‘Just the Facts’ poster children die from alcohol-related causes
Two out of the three students on the “Just the Facts” poster who drink four or fewer drinks when they party died Thursday night from what appear to be alcohol-related causes.
Children’s Studies minor merges with Business School
“We wanted to put the “preschool back in the B-school,” said Dean Mahendra Gupta of the Olin School of Business.
Student writes gibberish, ‘Jabberwocky’ poem on orgo test, receives 4 points
A freaking weird Organic Chemistry examination was discovered on March 1, sources disclosed this week. The exam received 4 points out of 100.
New exotic dance group appeals, gains the PAD additional funding
Despite a history of poor funding, things are looking up for Washington University’s Performing Arts Department. This year, in an unprecedented move, Chancellor Wrighton has agreed to allot $6,900 more to the department.