I have been charged with writing a column (which I agreed to do in a somewhat hazy state of mind, by the way), and since I am occasionally a man of my word, I decided to follow through.
With over one month on the NBA season in the books, it has become clear that there are two strata of basketball teams: the Los Angeles Lakers and everybody else. As the strict Lakers hater that I am, I find myself newly constricted to a robust diet of Devean George Can’t Hit A Shot and Horace Grant-endorsed Metamucil.
Flash back a mere three months ago. You know, back when you hadn’t missed a single class all semester and you and your buddies could enjoy nights of worry-free drinking. I know it seems so long ago for college students. A lot can change in three months, such as career choice or major.
Seemingly at the top of its game, the second-ranked Washington University volleyball team ran its winning streak to 18 matches this weekend with a sweep of the Washington University Classic. The Bears steamrolled past Illinois College, Webster University and Westminster College, losing just one set in the two-day extravaganza.
That’s right, I’m anointing James to the king’s throne vacated by Michael Jordan when he retired in 1998. It may be too early to compare James’ game to that of Michael Jordan (he’s more akin to Magic Johnson), but anyone who saw LeBron’s debut Wednesday night against Sacramento can no longer doubt that he is destined for great things.
So Kobe Bryant thinks the Lakers are his team? As Vizzini from “The Princess Bride” would say: Inconceivable! As Jeff Novack would say: Is there anything stuck between my teeth? Ever since Shaquille Rashaun O’Neal set foot in Tinseltown, he has been the focal point of the Lakers’ attack.
The Bears went into their swim meet with Drury with high hopes of shocking the Division II powerhouse. The Bears lost both the men’s and women’s competitions, but the team secured some individual victories. On the men’s side, Mike Slavik placed first in the 50-yard freestyle and the 200-yard backstroke.
While the festivities for homecoming weekend were more exciting in high school, the Washington University football team played in front of the largest crowd of the year Saturday when they hammered University Athletic Association (UAA) rival University of Chicago.
Some day Cubs fans will realize that it had to be this way. Natural law would not allow the Chicago Cubs to win another postseason series. Come on, Cubbies fans, you beat Atlanta in the National League Division Series. It was the first postseason series win by the North-Siders in 95 years.
Coming off a 0-0 tie against No. 3 Emory University last Saturday, the Washington University men’s soccer team will take to the road to battle two conference opponents. Emory was the first foe on the Bears’ University Athletic Association schedule. In the double-overtime contest, Colin Robinson made six saves in 110 minutes between the posts.
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