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Top 10 dumbest sports injuries
Posted By Scott Kaufman-Ross On November 18, 2005 @ 12:00 pm In Sports | No Comments
Injuries are a big part of every sport, and can ruin a talented athlete’s career. No one likes to see an injury to a player like the Jets’ Dennis Byrd, where the athlete’s career and life could be in question after being paralyzed by a helmet-to-helmet hit.
But sometimes as a fan, you have no choice but to sit back and laugh when an athlete gets hurt. There are instances where an athlete does something so stupid, or is so careless, that you have absolutely no sympathy for his or her injury and wonder how these guys actually get paid to do something with their bodies. Here is the list of the top 10 strangest, dumbest and funniest pro-athlete injuries of all time:
10. (Tie) Kellen Winslow Jr., Ron Gant, Jay Williams: All three of these guys had a type of motorcycle/dirt bike accident. Although not as amusing as some of the others, Jay Williams and Kellen Winslow Jr. have missed at least two years as a result of their injuries, and many question if they will ever play again. Nice job guys – you got a multimillion dollar contract, and blew it riding a bike.
9. Ken Griffey Jr.: There is not enough space in this paper to list all of Griffey’s injuries, but one stands out as the funniest. Ken once missed a game after his protective cup slipped, and pinched one of his testicles. Isn’t the cup supposed to stop you from getting hit where it hurts? Maybe that’s the real reason why Griffey can never get healthy. (He also once strained his back lifting boxes).
8. Jeff Kent: Although most people agree that Kent is lying about this injury, he missed the beginning of the 2002 season when falling off his pickup truck while attempting to wash it. Many believed he actually fell off a motorcycle, which would violate his contract, but the fact that he could make up a story as stupid as this is certainly worth mention.
7. Moises Alou: The best one-two punch on this list, Moises started things off by injuring his knee by falling off a treadmill in 1999. After recovering and planning to play in 2000, Alou then re-injured his knee after running over his son. with a bicycle. As a result, Moises was out of action for more than a season and also was also nominated for the “World’s Worst Father” award.
6. Glenallen Hill: There are many people afraid of spiders, but how many have had a nightmare about them, fallen out of bed and through a glass table, and never woken up from any of this? Hill did it and missed several games with cuts all over his body. Kind of puts those girls who make the guys kill spiders for them in perspective.
5. Clint Barmes: At one point winning the race for the NL batting title, Barmes’ rookie season came to a screeching halt when he broke his collarbone after falling down the stairs. Barmes was carrying a frozen load of deer meat, given to him by former NL batting champion Todd Helton. Looks like Todd was desperate to remain the last rookie to hold the batting crown.
4. Sammy Sosa: Aside from all the steroids and the corked bat controversy, Sammy Sosa really made headlines after missing time in 2004 with a strained ligament in his back. How did he get it? A violent sneeze. Sosa reportedly sneezed so hard that his back jerked forward causing the injury. Sosa was then ordered to stay away from pepper, pollen and ragweed for the remainder of the season.
3. Marty Cordova: Not the most famous guy on this list, but when you miss part of a season because you are sunburned, you become notable fairly quickly. The best part of the story, however, is that it was not a sunburn that occurred during a hot day in Arizona or Miami. Cordova actually burned himself while in a tanning salon in May 2002. When teammates were asked about it, they reported that he wanted to “look good in his prom pictures.”
2. Gus Frerotte: The sharpie, the pom-poms, the cell phone.all classic end zone celebrations. Yet none of them top the ever-popular slamming your head into the wall behind the end zone. In 1997, Frerotte decided to bang his head into the wall behind the end zone after his TD rush, and missed the rest of a key game with neck pains. I think someone needs to clarify to Gus the meaning of “use your head.”
1. Bill Gramatica: Not only the dumbest sports injury, but probably one of the stupidest things you’ll ever witness, period. After nailing a 42-yard field goal to put the lowly Arizona Cardinals up 3-0 in the first half of a regular season game, kicker Bill Gramatica jumped up in wild celebration, came down, and tore his ACL. Gramatica missed the rest of the season, and embarrassed the kicker position nationwide. Gramatica is no longer a kicker in the NFL, but will forever be remembered by me, and many others, for the funniest thing to ever happen on a football field.
- Pitcher Adam Eaton stabs himself while attempting to open a DVD in 2001.
- Vince Coleman misses the 1985 World Series after getting caught in the tarp machine.
- Wade Boggs misses games after hurting himself putting on his cowboy boots.
- Spanish goalie Santiago Canizares drops a bottle of cologne on his foot and misses the 2002 World Cup.
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 Weeks’ injuries hinder Bears’ offense in 0-0 tie: http://www.studlife.com/archives/Sports/2005/09/14/WeeksinjurieshinderBearsoffenseintie/
 WU 2001-2002 Annual Sports Review: http://www.studlife.com/archives/Sports/2002/04/18/WUAnnualSportsReview/
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