Something to Talk About
Summer. The word might bring to mind actual work and internships – chances to make some money to use throughout the next school year. Or, if you’re like me, it brings to mind the beach and the sun – becoming an amphibian, half the time in the water wakeboarding and skiing, half the time putting half-assed effort into a half-ass job. It’s absolutely wonderful.
So, depending on how you view the summer, you might find yourself viewing relationships the same way. Like my beach habits, I slack in relationships during the summer. I don’t even have relationships. But some people use the summer as a tool for the next year and the next relationship.
Summer can be the perfect time to find out how serious your present relationship is. Either you break up, become “open” (whatever that means), or you stay committed. If you break up, then the relationship wasn’t that serious. Maybe you’ve only been dating for a couple months or maybe you’ve been fighting lately. The wonderful thing about summer is that you can break up without hurting anyone too much.
The next option is a little more perplexing. The concept of the “open” relationship is quite foreign to me. I understand it as a way to experience other people without losing your significant other in case nothing better comes along. Kind of like a summer half-time show for a decent relationship. But I honestly don’t think that the relationship can be much better than decent for it to be open. One friend of mine explained it in the perfect manner: “Open relationships are like a safety deposit on an apartment. You’re willing to pay a little bit to keep the apartment available, but not willing to pay off the whole thing.”
If you have that ideal, harmonious, wonderful relationship, why would you ever give it up during the summer? Are hook ups too tempting? Or do you just want new experiences? If you do, then I venture to say that your relationship isn’t so perfect. Yet some people stay committed, stay in love and stay loyal to each other throughout the entire summer. I commend them, because the summer season is brimming with opportunities to slack. These couples hold it together and are worth it to each other. But let’s be honest: long-distance relationships are hard, tiring and a pain in the ass.
For those of you who are single or in an open relationship during the summer months, is a temporary relationship worth it? There are benefits to a relationship with an expiration date. You get to have carefree fun and not worry about being committed for the long haul. It is a chance to have experiences with none of the seriousness that relationships keep in tow. Yet sometimes this lighthearted relationship can become just what you never expected: significant. Kimmie Baker’s summer fling has turned very serious. Although they are not in a relationship by any definition of the word, they eagerly anticipate every summer.
Personally, I am strongly against any form of commitment during the summer. Last summer I got involved with someone from home and tried the long distance relationship. It lasted about two months, and it was terrible. My advice is this: be a great experience. Even if they only get to experience you for a day, a week or a month, make it fun. Practice being the girlfriend or boyfriend you ideally want to be. Go to the internship and learn how to have a “grown up” job. Then go on a date and learn how to be in a “grown up” relationship. But always, always be unforgettable.
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